Hello All, Sorry for the long read.. I would really appreciate honest genuine feedback, and as much of it as possible!!!! It's been awhile since I have been here because I had been doing my own soul searching. I am coming back to you with this question.. Is it possible to be attracted to the thought of being gay, but actually be totally straight?? Here is why... I am 31 yrs old, I have never been able to really pin point my sexuality as I was feeling like it was flip-flopping daily (since the age of 14). What I have come to realize as of recently is, when I am horny, like really, really, really horny only same sex fantasies will do. During these I will feel gay and only want to be gay. The moment I ejaculate and I mean the moment I am as straight as an arrow, it is not forced, but as natural as breathing. There is no freaking out, just wham, straight again. I once had been having semi-regular sex with a male (usually when I was really, really, really horny) and during intercourse it was great.. The moment it is over, just as self gratification I am totally straight afterwards, but I would also end up feeling disgusted with myself and the idea of me being gay would really upset me, not because I felt like I would be shunned from my inner-circle but because I felt like I wasn't being true to myself. I love women, everything about them! Sexually, romantically, just everything. But why is it when I am (really, really, really) horny do I feel turned on to the thought of everything gay. Which leads me to my initial question... Is it possible to just be attracted to the idea of being gay, without actually being gay?? Or, could I possibly be suppressing my true sexuality? Thanks for reading!!!
