Hey all, Been lurking around here for a little while, trying to figure stuff out for myself. Here's the short version: Until a couple months ago, I had never had sexual feelings for dudes (in retrospect, there were definitely romantic feelings, but I was terrible at introspection back then). More recently, I've been coming to terms with the fact that I'm bi, and have come out to a couple of my close friends. The hardest part was realizing that 1) you don't need to be born LGBT to be LGBT and 2) just because you "like men" doesn't mean you'll necessarily like "all men." Getting sidetracked, there was a point to this thread... I realized that I was bi because of an undeniable attraction to a certain (incredibly sexy) man, who is ostensibly straight. Either that or maintaining plausible deniability, I guess you could say. His family is religious (bible camp tier religious). He's not, which is a relief, but that doesn't bode well for anything between us in my cynically paranoid mind. Sure, he's giving me the extended eye contact, the touching (alcohol aided, sure, but lingering), and the attention that are causing my brain to be all "yo dude hes totally into u," but there's nothing there that is telling me for sure. Like, for sure sure. :dry: The fact that he's incredibly busy and never has time to hang out makes it more difficult for me. I keep second-guessing myself: what I think are sure signs one day aren't there the next. The fact that I'm naturally introverted and not as good in small groups of strangers as I am one-on-one adds fuel to the fire, since we usually hang out with a group of his friends that I don't know well, and I tend to be more passive in groups like that. At this point, I'm not really sure what I should do. I really want to make my feelings known, but he's also part of a few of my friend groups and I don't want to alienate anyone by wearing my heart on my sleeve. Appreciate the help. TLDR (seriously): I would like to borrow someone's gaydar, mine is the shiny 2013 model with the limited warranty and the planned obsolescence and I don't know how to work it.
Does he know you're bisexual? Maybe if there was anything there, and he knew you're bisexual he'd make it more obvious. I'd say come out to him if you've not already, and then if nothing happens or changes try distance yourself a bit before you fall in too deep. Crushes on straight friends suck big time!
