sex info: bottoms

My advice would be to go slow in every way, physically, mentally, emotionally. Get help from a therapist to find out why you feel this way. Find a man who can gently acclimate you to the techniques that you wish to learn. You may find yourself attracted to such a man and this will only enhance your experiences.

 

Nah.

Just make sure he's patient and gentle. There are also gay/bi guys who don't like anal at all, and there's nothing wrong with that as long as both partners are in agreement.

 

Hmm, not sure he should see a therapist because he likes to bottom...but that's just my opinion. Some gays enjoy topping, others enjoy bottoming, others just enjoy being verse.

Now, from what I'm told by a few of my best gay male friends, they started 'prepping' for bottom sex by using dildos. Go from very very small, to a normal sized penis and remember to use lots of lube. I hope that helps a little.

 

Hello there. I have only bottomed once so I don't have a lot of experience on that, however I have experimented a lot with various dildos and plugs over the years. I would say that prepping yourself that way will help a lot, it did for me. Obviously start small. You can buy sets of plugs with varying sizes which are for beginners, that might be a good start. You can also just try out with your fingers if you're more comfortable that way. Just make sure no matter what you're doing it with, you use lots of good quality lube.

As for being with a partner, just make sure he goes very slowly and uses plenty of lube. Make sure he understands it has been a long time for you etc beforehand. And just try and have fun I guess!

 

As far as issues of prepping and lack of experience I'd suggest checking out the Resources tab here on EC. Look under the Health section and you will find some articles on prepping for anal and doing it properly and safely and such. You might also run a search on the forum as there are multiple threads on the topic.

In terms of 'techniques', the two best things you can do are (in no particular order):

a) Experiment and Pay Attention - when you're with your guy, see how he reacts to different things. Different guys have different turn-on or things that feel especially pleasurable for them. This could be anything from talking dirty to him to running your fingers through his chest hair while he's topping you to squeezing him with your rectal muscles in a particular manner or rhythm. Note what he seems to enjoy most and then do it more. If he seems to really like more than one thing, try mixing and matching things and see if he likes it even more.

b) Learn to control your rectal muscles - with a bit of practice you can learn relax and let a guy in very easily and with no pain. Just as important (especially if your guy likes this sort of thing) you can learn to grip and release with a fair amount of control - to the point that it's almost like having another hand available.

Hope this helps,

Todd

 

If you can get one made for anal, it'll be better. It's usually thicker and doesn't dry out as much.

The same-old same-old is that you should be using a condom no matter what. If you're using a latex condom, any petroleum based lube like vaseline will break down the rubber of the condom and destroy it, so no oil based lube.

Water based is good, but it can dry out quick. Reactivating it with spit work well and it's quick.

There is also food grade silicone lube which is safe for consumption and condoms. It's a little better at not drying out.

A word of caution: just remember never to use the same product against one another.
Example: don't use silicone lube on a silicone dildo. It'll destroy it. Don't use vaseline on a condom or a rubber dildo, it'll destroy them.

Water based is pretty universal.