Me and my friend were talking and it got brought up that I am asexual and he said im not "normal" for being asexual which make me a little frustrated because just like heterosexual and homosexual couple I did not choose to be asexual. Its like Asexuality is some weird idea that people who have it are oppressing their sexuality which is total BS. I really hate how uneducated some people are about this topic. He also said if "you found the right person why wouldn't give out for them" Well I shouldn't have to give out just because someone I like wants sex its my body and I wont do anything that'll make me go beyond my comfort zone just to please someone. ~kind of a rant~
Yeah it's odd why people can't deal with someone being Asexual, it's no more weird or "wrong" than being straight, gay or bi/pan/omni/whatever and I honestly don't understand why someone would feel it's wrong to begin with. I hope you manage to convince your friend that you are not abnormal, because you are really not. Stay strong and hang in there.
I think it's all to do with the fact that asexuality is harder to understand or even try to understand than any existing orientation (by this I mean that asexuality is a lack of orientation, at least I think). The average person believes that all people desire sex, that it is a basic need that everyone has. The absence of this desire is something most people can't even comprehend. Hell, I don't comprehend it. The way I see it, asexuality, as well as any orientation, is just something that exists and that's all there is to it. There is no "weird" preference. PS: This friend of yours brought up an argument that sounds alot like a common argument that people make against homosexuality. Just saying.
I don't get why people go all nutty over Asexuals. They simply don't get it. I try explaining as being the opposite of bisexuality.
There are still tons of misconceptions about asexuality. Given that much of western culture is highly sexualized something like asexuality would be misunderstood. Also asexuality also comes in varying degrees. For me I've had crushes on people yet I haven't wanted to have sex with them, or anyone for that matter. And even if you do find someone whom you have a deep connection with, you still may not want to have sex with them. Some asexuals would do that. And others might have sex...out of curiosity or to please their partner. It will take some time for asexuality to be widely recognized and accepted. But what you could do for now is to help to get asexuality more known.
Yes it is difficult to comprehend asexuality. May be sexuality here is manifested into a craving for romantic feelings. I don't know... but it is necessary to spread more awareness about asexuality.
I think that part of the reason is that we live in such a hypersexualized culture.. you see sexual images everywhere. Sex sells, and our culture uses that to the highest extent possible.
You'll have to deal with dumb arguments like that most of your life. I'm 30 and continue to get "you still asexual?" questions. Best thing you can do is remain patient and try to have compassion because those people just have a hard time wrapping their minds around it. Usually they don't intend to be rude. Visibility is already improving the situation. Accept that most people won't understand you and just have confidence in yourself. I had a "friend" that wanted to harp on it, I just set a boundary about talking about it with him, he couldn't respect it so I stopped associating with him. Don't keep people around who just bring negativity in your life.
That's cool; this is how I explain it: "So let's say there's a girl, and she's straight (for the purposes of my explanation, let's assume Kinsey 0). That means that she is sexually attracted to guys. Also, that means she is NOT sexually attracted to girls. In the same way, a gay girl (let's assume Kinsey 6) is sexually attracted to girls and specifically NOT sexually attracted to guys. Now, each girl's Kinsey number could vary, but there is a point that they could be 100% not attracted to a specific gender. Now let's take someone who is bi. Like the first girl, this person IS sexually attracted to guys, and like the second girl, this person IS sexually attracted to girls. Asexuality is just the flip side of that. Like the first girl, an ace IS NOT sexually attracted to girls, and like the second girl, the ace IS NOT sexually attracted to guys." Generally people understand this pretty well, but that's only if they have an open mind to listen instead of just saying that I must be broken. I hope the colors helped! If blue = sexual attraction to guys, red = sexual attraction to girls, then: straight girl straight guy gay girl gay guy bi girl bi guy ace girl ace guy (yellow is the opposite of purple, right?) The only problem with this model is that it stays within the gender binary :eusa_doh: :eusa_naug :bang: Hope this helps people with explaining! -Ace of Hearts (*hug*)