Alright. So. Im 16. I'm a junior in high school. And I'm a girl. I started taking chemistry at the beginning of the year and over the course of the semester I've found that I'm extremely attracted to my (also) female chemistry teacher. And it's not just that I'm physically attracted to her (which I am), but I also love her voice and her personality and basically everything about her. I've never been this strongly attracted to another woman before so I'm not sure if I'm bisexual and just now realizing it or if I'm just completely infatuated with her or if it's something else entirely. I'm just...very confused and I need help understanding why I feel this way. Most students fall for teachers that give them special attention or take an interest in them, but that isn't the case for me. In fact, I'm pretty sure that she thinks I don't like her because I'm very blunt when I answer her questions and try not to smile or show any kind of facial expression when I'm around her (this partially has to do with the fact that I can't look her in the eyes anymore without turning bright red and also that this is what I do when I don't know how to talk to people. It's a defense mechanism, I guess). She's in her late twenties and a little on the short side. She's married...and has two kids. She has short curly/wavy hair and huge blue eyes. Like, so blue that they're almost white. And she has really long eyelashes too (I really like her eyes okay). She's unconventionally beautiful and in my opinion is one of the most attractive women I've ever met. Her personality is fantastic, too. I can't stop thinking about her. Like the thought of her literally consumes me. At my school, we have A and B days, and I have her on B days. On A days I find myself constantly looking down the hallways for her and glancing out of classrooms hoping that she'll walk by. B days are the worst because I literally COUNT DOWN THE HOURS until I have class with her. I get butterflies while I'm walking to her class and physically shake with nervousness when I get into her classroom. Half the time I'll find myself unconsciously staring at her, and the other half of the time I'll look/gawk at her while she's turned away. I've thought about kissing her before, and, uh, being with her, in like, a sexual way. When I think about doing that sort of stuff with other girls, it turns me off. She's the only woman that I've thought this way about, and that's why I'm so completely, utterly confused. Have you ever looked at a person and finally understood every sappy love song you've ever heard? Yeah, that's how I feel about her. So, in short, why do I feel this way about her? Is it my raging teenage hormones? Am I in love with her? Infatuated? Obsessed? Does this mean that I'm bisexual??? (Also, sorry for writing so much. I just really needed to talk about this, obviously.) Thanks.
I totally understand the weird feelings that come with liking your first girl. I consider myself bisexual, but I've only really liked one girl I liked when I was in high school. I have liked girls after that but nothing was as crazy and obsessive as her. You might be bisexual, or it might be an exception, or you might just be more straight but still like women- some people are int he grey area..message me if you want to talk more! I can help you promise.
Hello there! I've signed up here just to send you a message cause this is the only way I know how to communicate with you. The thing is, that's exactly what happened to me. And I'm pretty sure we're the same age as well, lol. I'd love to tell you more about my experience and I would also love to hear more about yours. I'm not sure how this site works but I hope you receive this message even though your post was 5 years ago. Hoping to receive a reply, Agatha
