1. This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this site, you are agreeing to our use of cookies. Learn More.

Currently freaking out.

Discussion in 'Sexual Orientation' started by WhoEvenKnows, Jan 1, 2014.

  1. WhoEvenKnows

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Dec 31, 2013
    Messages:
    8
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Female
    I'm really confused. All my life I've been 'different' but now, I just don't know. I have only had one crush on someone of the opposite gender, and he's VERY feminine. Now I'm completely in love with this beautiful, intelligent, talented, perfect, AMAZING girl, even though I've only ever facetimed and texted her. She lives really close to me but doesn't go to my school. I tell her everything and she has told me that she thinks I'm beautiful and she trusts me more than anyone. Her name is Sarah and I really think I love her. Here's the problem; she has no idea what my sexuality is, and neither do I. Plus, I've never even seen her in person or talked with her for more than 2 hours. And I'm only 13. I'm confident enough to come out to my friends and parents, but I don't know what to say. Am I bi, pan, lesbian...? I took the Kinsey Scale test and got "homosexual, but more than incidentally heterosexual" but I've also gotten other results that said I'm completely homo or completely hetero. I know I'm just figuring things out, but I need some guidance. What am I?
     
  2. Anthemic

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Dec 17, 2012
    Messages:
    1,890
    Likes Received:
    7
    Location:
    Alabama
    Gender:
    Female
    Gender Pronoun:
    She
    Sexual Orientation:
    Lesbian
    Out Status:
    Some people
    I think you might be Kinsey 5 homosexual and more drawn to feminine people, especially girls. How did you two meet?
     
  3. WhoEvenKnows

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Dec 31, 2013
    Messages:
    8
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Female
    We met through a friend, her best friend (William). He thought we'd get along so the three of us started a group message.
     
  4. Anthemic

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Dec 17, 2012
    Messages:
    1,890
    Likes Received:
    7
    Location:
    Alabama
    Gender:
    Female
    Gender Pronoun:
    She
    Sexual Orientation:
    Lesbian
    Out Status:
    Some people
    Try mentioning what you think about LGBT culture and see how she reacts. Does she talk about guys?
     
  5. WhoEvenKnows

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Dec 31, 2013
    Messages:
    8
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Female
    She never talks about guys, although she dated one guy for about 2 months. And trust me, I've tried bringing sexual orientations up, but she just changes the subject! :frowning2:( Is that good or bad? What could it mean?
     
  6. Foster

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Dec 4, 2013
    Messages:
    392
    Likes Received:
    0
    You don't need to rush and label yourself. Explore and date, and see who you are and aren't attracted to. Eventually you'll know for sure, but there's no reason why you have to know right now. And don't get your hopes up about this girl until you know for sure if she's gay or Bi. You might want to just ask her if casually bringing the subject up doesn't work. If she isn't, don't feel too bad about. You're still very young, and there will be many other people you'll fancy :slight_smile:
     
  7. Anthemic

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Dec 17, 2012
    Messages:
    1,890
    Likes Received:
    7
    Location:
    Alabama
    Gender:
    Female
    Gender Pronoun:
    She
    Sexual Orientation:
    Lesbian
    Out Status:
    Some people
    Oh she changes the subject? That might be a good indicator. Could you give me a detailed example of a time you tried talking about it? I'll be able to figure the situation out better that way.
     
  8. WhoEvenKnows

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Dec 31, 2013
    Messages:
    8
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Female
    Thank you so much :slight_smile: It's still something I worry about though. I want to come out because it will make me feel comfortable, but first I have to figure out what I am. I'll try not to worry too much though!

    ---------- Post added 2nd Jan 2014 at 03:57 PM ----------

    One time I told her I wanted to join the GSA at school. I told her that I'm not 100% straight and that I might find friends like me. And she told me that she's making quiche for dinner.
    Another time I asked her what she thinks of discrimination against people based on their sexual orientations and she told me that she tries not to think about it, then went on to ask me what my favorite sport is... I don't really know what you could make of that.
     
  9. Anthemic

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Dec 17, 2012
    Messages:
    1,890
    Likes Received:
    7
    Location:
    Alabama
    Gender:
    Female
    Gender Pronoun:
    She
    Sexual Orientation:
    Lesbian
    Out Status:
    Some people
    Ok yeah... That is weird. Either she doesn't agree with it, or she isn't completely sure about her orientation and is ashamed. I'd keep bringing it up and ask her why she keeps changing the subject.
     
  10. WhoEvenKnows

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Dec 31, 2013
    Messages:
    8
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Female
    Update: I'm going to meet her sometime during the week so I plan on asking her about it then.
    Until then, I'm going to try and bring it up more.
    And I'm thinking I'm probably Kinsey 5.
     
  11. MightNeedThis

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Jun 2, 2013
    Messages:
    100
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Southern MA
    You situation sounds eerilie similar to one of my closest friends.

    For funsies sake, let's call her Josie. Josie had only every had romantic [and to be honest, sexual] encounters with men. She'd never looked at a girl and thought of them as anything more, and the thought of being anything other than straight never crossed her mind. On a Kinsey scale, she was pretty much a 0. However, that all changed when she met Debbie. She fell for her pretty much instantly, and she fell hard. She couldn't even really deny it or talk herself out of it. Deb knew she was at least curious, and eventually they got together.

    Thing is, though, Josie still doesn't know what to call herself other than Deb's girlfriend. And at the end of the day, that is all she cares about.

    What I'm trying to say is titles don't really matter; happiness does. Don't stress yourself too much.
     
  12. WhoEvenKnows

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Dec 31, 2013
    Messages:
    8
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Female
    that's not my my situation but its a cute story and it definitely made me feel better :slight_smile: I guess that is what this comes down to; labels. Thank you so much! :')