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Trouble accepting myself?

Discussion in 'Sexual Orientation' started by WearyWanderer, Jan 2, 2014.

  1. WearyWanderer

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    Just recently I came out to a small part of my family as bi, (they were completely accepting by the way) but even while saying it out loud it didn't sound right. It just doesn't sit well with me for some reason, and I don't know why. No matter how many times I try to say it to myself now, I just feel awkward and weird. The idea of bisexuality is appealing to me, but the title doesn't sit well with me. I want to tell some of my trustworthy friends about this...but first I feel I need to respect who I am, you know? Any advice/personal experiences that you guys had with accepting yourself would be greatly appreciated. Thanks guys :slight_smile:
     
  2. BookDragon

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    Don;t force a label that doesn't fit...I realise telling everyone you're 'not completely straight' or something might make you sound a bit weird but it's still accurate...
     
  3. StephenSC

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    I assume your comfortable with the idea, and are sure you are Bi? My thoughts are that is it more important to be comfortable with yourself, prior to being comfortable with that label that "commonly" suites you. If your not ready or not sure who you are yet trying to give yourself a label is bound to make you feel uneasy.

    As you've said the idea is appealing to you, I think you should just give yourself some time to see if the label starts to suite. I'm sure when you first had the ideas that you were Bi they were a little confronting and made you uncomfortable, but in time you came to accept them? Coming out, and labelling yourself to others is a huge step, sort of the final step, in that process of accepting who you are and then letting others it. So it makes sense it can take a little time to warm to the title.
     
  4. biggayguy

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    Would the "gay" label sit better or worse with you? For several years I wore the bi' label. Then a video made me realize I was really quite gay. Using bisexual was just a way to deny my gayness. YMMV
     
  5. Etak

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    First off, I totally read the title as "trouble accessing myself," and came her expecting to read a completely different thread.

    With that aside, I completely understand where you're coming from. I tried telling people that I was bi, and it didn't feel right. One day, I asked myself "am I even attracted to guys at all?" That's the part I'm still trying to figure out. Also, I know that there's a lot of pressure to find a label that fits, but labels don't matter. Words like "bisexual," "gay," and "lesbian" are not images to live up to, they are terms used to describe what someone already is.

    Good luck!
     
  6. WearyWanderer

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    @ElliaOtaku- yeah, maybe...but I think it would be best if I told them in a way they'd really understand, and I'm not sure "not straight" would cut it. But that title sits a bit better with me I admit.

    @JasonSC- I'm fairly sure that I'm bi, yeah. Very interesting post to read, and I think that I've been "skipping around," you could say. I think I might wait to find out what suits me best before I tell anyone else.

    @biggayguy- I'm pretty sure I'm bi, although sometimes I'm not sure. I check out guys a lot more than girls, but I'm still attracted to the opposite sex. But maybe the same sex a bit more if I'm honest. Out of curiosity, what was the video you saw?

    ---------- Post added 3rd Jan 2014 at 12:24 PM ----------

    @Etak - haha well glad you reread the title then! :stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes:
    Anyway, thanks for that. I've been trying to find the right label for a while, but never have been comfortable with one. However, other people seem to like labels, and it kinda helps them understand the situation better. Without it, it might just lead to more questions and put me in an even more awkward position then I'm already in. But if the situation fits me, then I guess it's the best thing to tell them. Thanks! :slight_smile: