Parents trying to convince you that you're heterosexual/bisexual not gay

Sigh. Tell him that he is probably bi, but he hasn't met the right guy yet.

 

The only thing you really CAN do is to keep telling him that there is NO chance of it happening.

However, you might consider telling him that actually you completely happy with that. Not so much that you WON'T marry a guy, but that you MIGHT marry a girl (if that's something you would actually do of course)...

 

Royal pain, that is. I guess what I'd do is tell him in a very calm, controlled voice that maybe that's true, but don't hold out hope for it, and it's not up to him to decide. You'll just see what happens and accept it as it comes.

If he's the type to never have reason reach his ears, maybe all you can do is correct him if it bothers you and when he won't shut up, buy a good pair of headphones or earplugs.

I have the feeling my parents might take this tack, too, at least in the beginning, if I ever came clean with them.

 

He seems to be grasping at straws. I don't know but isn't it the bargaining stage of grief?

 

I may be wrong about the order but
Grief
Denial
Bargaining
something else...
Acceptance
(Synthesis?:lol

EDIT: Wow I was wrong
Denial
Anger
Bargaining
Depression
Acceptance
(can we include Synthesis? :lol

 

I wouldn't know anything about that...my dad decided to go that 'You must want to have sex with cats' route instead...I honestly would have much rather had this experience than the one I got. When your a kid and find out how little your father really thinks of you as a person it just kind of sucks

 

Yea, my mom told me that it is natural for people to be nervous around the opposite sex, that everyone is curious about same-sex anatomy for a brief time, that just because people stay single does not exactly mean they're gay, and that I'm in college and that college is a glimpse of the real world.

 

Sort of my mom tells me that I'm only allowed to date girls because guys are jerks apparently

 

Definitely. Especially because I came out when I was fourteen and I'm a femme. Most people thought I was going through a phase.

 

I've never heard of a parent insisting that their kid is bi, in any situation. But the fact that he's become okayish with a bit daughter means he may eventually come to accept you as you are in the future. Just my interpretation.

 

o_0 I totes forgot that synthesis came up in chemistry. Moreover, forgot it was a type of reaction. And yay Ikr? The word is awesome. Being involved in education and an avid pokemon player, the word synthesis amusis me.

 

This is why I only plan to come out to my family when I'm in a serious relationship with a woman. That way they couldn't say I'm confused, they'd have to accept that I'm happy with a woman and over time they might even grow to like her. When you're single it's easier for them to deny it, I guess, they hope that you'll wake up one day and decide that you want a traditional family with a man after all.

 

This happened to me a little in the beginning, but not too much. I came out to my family at 16, when my parents were trying to convince me to get confirmed in the Catholic Church. Their argument for it was that I might want to get married in the Church some day. My argument against it was that I would never be allowed to get married in the Catholic Church, because I was gay. (Looking back, not sure it was the best time to come out to them. :lol: ) My mom tried to convince me that I might "change my mind," but I don't know if that was denial of my sexuality or due to the fact that she really wanted me to be confirmed in the Church. After they realized that I was not budging on the confirmation issue, however, they were extremely accepting of it.

It became more of an issue when I started dating my first girlfriend. Her mom and sister could not accept our relationship or her sexuality in any way, shape, or form. Her mom even went as far as saying that my girlfriend had a hormonal imbalance and that was why she suddenly liked girls. (I was the first girl she ever dated; she had only dated boys prior to me.) I believe her mom is much more accepting now, and I suspect I only bore the brunt of her intolerance because I was first. We broke up last February and she dates women exclusively now.

As for her sister, I think part of it had to do with age and not completely understanding. She was only 10 or 11 when we first started dating, and we attempted to hide our relationship from her for a while because that's what my ex's mom wanted us to do. Unfortunately, one fateful day, she walked in on us kissing (we were in my ex's room with the door closed, and she was just being a little kid, creeping in to see what we were up to)... and that was the end of that! What a day that was. :lol: I don't think she ever fully understood or accepted us while we were dating, but I hope, for my ex's sake, that it's a lot easier for her now.

So long story short, you're definitely not alone, and it certainly is an awful feeling when people think they know you better than you know yourself. I wish I could tell you for sure that your dad will come to accept you over time, like my ex's mom did, but I can't tell you that for sure. All that I recommend is that you continue, like other posters have said, to repeat yourself and really drive it home that no, you're not going to be changing any time soon.

 

I'm 27, came out to my parents at 22, my first same sex relationship was at 15, and my Mom still think I be straight if I pray hard enough, because their church says so. Or that if I can't repress my sinful urges, to just get married anyway, have babies, and eventually the gayness will just magically go away. Although I do happen to be bisexual, they don't care about that, because according to their beliefs, it still goes against what the bible says. Although in my moms case, she would probably overlook that if I got married to a guy and got knocked up and squeezed out some grandchildren for her. That, plus the fact that my guy relationship is fairly new and maybe just a phase (lol) is why I haven't told them. I know for a fact if we break up I'm dating women again, and even if not probably will never have kids, so why should it matter to them.

 

The opposite have actually happened to me, with my mother trying to convince me that I am gay because she finds bisexuality to be a phase. Parents can be weird and dumb sometimes.