How can i differentiate the two?

Alright well I have anxiety. And anxiety and attraction/arousal all feel the same. And I'm not sure how I can differentiate between them. I'm not sure if I should wait until I'm on my medication to make a call of my sexuality or just do it now. But liek I said I can't differentiate. Is there any way I can? Does anyone know the difference or a way I can tell?

 

And one more question. I'm sorry I'm always posting ik it's annoying. But it takes a Long time for me to jerk off to guys, like a really long time. But it does for girls also.i guess not as long, it's shorter. But here is the problem. I don't get aroused from guys, and when i masturbate I clench my groin area to make it go faster. Only when I think of a guy clenching can it be like more easier, and all I do is think of the guy clenching the same area I do, the groin area. And I'm not sure if it's just making it sync my mind with what I feel that can make it easier for me. But if i just Think of a guy, and even having sex with him it does not work. But then as soon as I think of some guy clenching his abdominal/groin are does it become easier for me. And it's just whoever, no specific guy. I'm not sure if this is all mental. Like making my mind think of clenching and then my groin area clenching makes me think of ejaculation and good feelings. Anyways, in my fantasies It will always change to a girl. Because even when I think of a guy clenching it still does not work all the way. And eventually I'm sitting there for some odd minutes trying to think of guys, and then I think about a girl which is easier for my mind to stay on and think about then it works. It's just weird because yesterday when I had a fantasy, I was thinking king of a guy clenching his abs and I clenched my groin area harder because of it, and it had the affect on me where it made it easier to go along. Plus I have anxiety kicking in during it like I said. But anyways I'm stumped. Like i tried thinking of the same guy I thought of yesterdat, but this time it was still a no go, it was even harder to do I had to like really really go fast and hard and eventually my hand hurt and I got tired so then I switched to a girl. I'm sorry for posting I am just so stumped.

 

Yes, I can explain! Well when you feel attrcated to someone you get this rush of blood and a little shortness of breath. And the same thing happens with anxiety! Maybe I'm wrong. But I was even told this. Anyways I can account for it, because when I get anxiety, it feels the same way as I would when attrcated to a girl. Like any anxiety I get. Maybe from being worried about being sick or dying. It all feels the same. And I guess not arousal, because arousal will make my thing get hard. So I know when it's arousal u could say. But attraction and anxiety feel the same to me. Maybe slight differences between both. Which sometimes I can tell, but I'm not completely sure which is why I asked on here. Or maybe when I'm attracted to a girl I get anxiety also because I get nervous, and when i get anxiety with other stuff its making me think anxiety and attraction feel the same. Okay nevermind I'm just confusing myself even more -.- ugh I hate how I do this ish -.-

And I was doing it in the first place to because I read some post from chip. So I decided to give it a try for a day or two. And I mean I guess I don't have to do it but I wanna have a clearer picture. If you tell me to think of whatever I want I'll think of girls. But how do I know that I'm not thinking about guys because I'm trying to deny it? So that's why I am doing what chip posted. I mean I don't have to do it anymore but I want a CLEARER picture. I probably won't end up doing it anyways

 

Ouch :0 ...... that was a just sounded like a TAD bit of pain when using the hammer...but not too much. Lol. But okay I get your point. But I'm not sure if u remember yesterday when I posted that gay fantasy thing. How I was reminded of a picture of a guy and I had that in my head while whacking off. Well I was thinking of his abs like I said, and I got this feeling of like shock. Just I don't know if it was anxiety or not because I got it like a second after I thought about it and went "what if I'm attrcated to that". So now I domt know if what I felt was anxiety or not. I just dont know what I felt. Which is why I also tried thi king of it today, and today was a no go for it, just was taking too long like I said and it was not working. So it leads me to believe I got anxious yesterday but then again idk. It's like adding to the confusion. Idk why I had to he reminded of it -.- too many problems going on with me ayeee. But see now, if I imagine a girl with nice toned abs I like that. So wth! I'm gunna bring this up to my therapist and get this sorted out. It's too much going on and I don't expect anyone here to help me because it confuses the he'll out of me and idk how anyone else could understand lmao. I'll get my therapist now guys Thankyou

 

It may have been anxiety but I'm not sure! It's just getting way more complicated the more I try to figure everything out. Is it anyway possible to have a gay fantasy and have it good? But then never have it again? If anytjing that could he the case for this, or maybe to put this worry to rest at least. But can you have a one time fantasy and like it, but then never really have the urge or want to do it again because it just was not your thing. I mean now that I think about it, i believe it was anxiety but I just don't know. This is how I obsess, I don't know stuff and I want to know so I go to great strides to figure stuff out. Aye ohh well :/

 

Okay I get your point, I see I do! It makes sense to me now. Thank you for that good sounding example. Sounds satisfying indeed. -.- lol

 

I'm Gunna have to let it slid because I don't know and that'd a killer to me. Not knowing is terrible. But I cannot recall what I felt, do all I can do is let it go like u said. And it kills me to do that. Lol. But it's what I have to do. I'll take a pass on this one. And yes you are correct that is the idea I have unfortunately :/ , I wish I could change it a bit. It would probably release all of this tension. Like i never thought about a guy that way my whole life and all that. So it makes sense for me to worry. But I do it to myself -.- . Your right tho with what u said, straight people can experiment. I never have and I really don't want to. Maybe I should to help me, but I will never just because I wouldn't be able too, litterly I do not want to do that just cause I don't want to.

 

Your sure as hell right man. Freaking confusing ish. It's annoying not knowing 100% lol. If I look at it from that perspective I will give myself this then, I prefer girls. And I will just leave it at that for now. Trying to label myself during this time is just causing me stress, ik I prefer girls so.ill say that for now if that's okay. I'm learning a lot of life lessons going through this too. Thank you for your help sam! Your the man! Lol hopefully after a year I can continue too be myself again as I lost everything in myself. Failed school, don't do anything g anymore and all that. I used to have a 3.9 gpa, be outgoing, very athletic, extremely nice to everyone and worked out! Now it's all gone! I want it back! I'm gunna have to continue on not being 100% sure for about anything about myself now ! Thank you and enjoy the rest of your day! (!)(!):smilewave

 

Well I fantasized about guys to analyze it in the first place..I'm not sure if that caused me more confusion. It probably did. I'm like in a hole I can't get out of lol

 

Well no I did do your exercise. But I do it and then I'm like "okay I'm not gay" then I go I'm a circle again and start worrying and doubting again just because I will do that because I want more proof and I keep going into circles basically. It's hard to describe. I do it, but at the same time I dont. And thank you for your help chip