Do you ever wish sexuality didn't exist? The best way I've heard of describing myself is a bi-romantic homosexual. I class myself as a lesbian, as I don't actively want to be in a long term relationship with a man. I wouldn't say I regret coming out as a lesbian, but it's so difficult trying to get my friends and family to understand that one day, I could be in a relationship with a man. Everyone's sexuality is personal and unique. Do you ever wish you could be completely label free?
Just tell people you're bisexual instead. Then your free to date who you want, or just tell your family that although you are predominately homosexual, there is always a chance you might fall in love with a man.
Honestly, I think labels are annoying, I wish people could just go be with whoever they fancy and live happily without being judged or labeled for it. But it's sadly something we must live with!
I certainly wish this. But I did it out of spite. I have seen ups and downs ever since i discovered my sexuality, but others make me feel like I shouldn't be gay. Ya know? So really i do and dont wish this, i mostly believe in equality where we don't have to have these feelings of recanting our sexuality.
I like labels because it lets other people know what i like but I don't think their for everyone I personally am not attracted to men at all and can only be friends with them so i prefer the label lesbian but i think the best maybe is if you don't like labels don't use them and if the others don't fit make one that goes the best for you . Some people fit in the boxes others don't it's part of life . You can also list yourself as bi les or open minded lesbian an open minded lesbian that is not apposed to having sex with a man or dating one but mostly likes women i've seen some lesbians like you using that label . If you don't like going with bisexual label
The bad thing about labels is that take over your think and the way others see you. Its like you're not a person, you're "the lesbian" or "the gay guy" or "that queer kid" or whatever. We are people, we have issues, just like everyone else. Other people are people too, even though they're different, they're still just like you.
I think I'm weird because I actually like labels. As long as I identify myself with them, of course. I think it would be confusing if everybody may fall in love with everybody and we never knew if we had a chance with someone without going straight to the point and telling them that we like them. But then again, that's just my opinion.
Labels should not act as restrictions. They are just a way to find people who you're interested in. If I identified as "unlabeled", I would have a hard time meeting women who like women. Labels are like Twitter #hashtags.
I totally agree with Huma At the moment, I am unlabeled and I'm okay with that for the time being. I used to label myself as a gay woman because I am predominantly attracted to women emotionally/sexually. I have been with men in the past, but I do not feel comfortable labeling myself as bisexual. Why? Because I prefer to be in a romantic relationship with a woman only. However, that doesn't mean that I will never date nor have sex with a man ever again because honestly, who knows what the future holds. I'm currently in a non exclusive relationship with a man (my ex) and I care for him a lot, but being with him isn't going to work out. It seems like I never make it pass three months dating a man, before I feel the need of wanting to be with a woman again.
Labels only matter if you choose to make them matter. You are not a label. You are you. I might like women, but there's so much more to me than "Lesbian" could ever describe. So don't get flustered about the labels and stereotypes. Just be you
It's definitely different for everyone, and of course I hate labels being used in negative ways. Or people only "seeing" the label, not the person. The question, though... It would be so much easier if sexuality was just... there. If labels didn't exist, if we could all just be with whoever we wanted and it wouldn't be an issue at all. It wouldn't be "oh she's a lesbian because she has a girlfriend!" even if you actually like men too. But personally, labels have helped me. It helps me hide, helps me explain, and helps me understand myself. I'm a lesbian, to anyone I know. I tell people that so we know where we stand, if we can be friends (also to prevent the hundreds of "do you have a boyfriend yet?" type questions). Only a small handful of internet friends know I'm not "just" lesbian... I've discovered I identify more in the pan-romantic region. And honestly, that specific label helped me understand what I was feeling and why, because I was having some issues accepting a certain crush I had. I'd never heard of pan-anything before. But it helped me see things clearer.
I have a love/hate relationship with labels. Personally, i like them because they help people get a general idea of what is going on in my head, and it gives them little ways to give a vague, general guideline to help determine my personality. However, once people start to take them to extremes and assume labels are a "one size fits all" type deal i get very annoyed.
Hopefully in the future, people are given the freedom to not label their personal sexuality and instead are allowed to be with anybody!
I feel exactly the same way. If you allow a label to restrict you, it will. However, if you keep an open mind and acknowledge the possibility that it could potentially change, then it won't. I personally like labels, because as others have said, they give people a general idea of what is going on in my head and help me to understand myself better. But on the other hand, it is very annoying when people make assumptions, such as in your case, Laura, when you identify as lesbian but understand there is a possibility that you might get into a relationship with a man at some point. People assume that makes you less of a lesbian, when in fact, it doesn't. You can identify however you wish to identify, in whatever way feels most comfortable to you. Your sexuality is unique to you, as you said, and only you can define it. So while I don't necessarily wish to be label-free, I do wish people had a better understanding of labels and didn't use them in a derogatory manner, base stereotypes off of them, or make other incorrect assumptions regarding them. I'm actually surprised at the response to this question. On another forum that I'm a member of, everyone is so gung-ho about being label-free, and I've always been the odd one out in terms of what I believe. Glad to see I'm not alone here! (!)
