Hi! So to sum up the situation, I have had two serious relationships with boys that lasted both more than a year, I really thought I was straight and never questioned it. And then completely fell in love with that girl, it was totally unexpected and I had no idea I could have feelings for girls. We stayed together for six months, I was madly in love with her and totally accepted my bisexuality. And since then I feel like I'm not attracted to boys anymore. When I realised that, I got frustrated and I didn't want it to be true. So to prove myself that I was bi and not gay, I slept with a guy that I found attractive. It was so awful. I didn't want him to touch me, I wanted a girl to touch me. It was hurting. I don't know why I hated it like that. It wasn't that the guy was bad, it was different, I felt guilty, it just didn't seem right at all. Will I ever be able to be with a guy again ? I feel like the relationship I had with this girl put me off boys forever cause now I feel like I'm not even attracted to men anymore at all. It's disturbing because before meeting that girl I had never questioned my sexuality and now it seems that my whole life changed.
I certainly don't think she "made you gay", although she may have "made you realize that you're gay." When I was growing up, I assumed I was straight. And since I'm not very visually attuned, I didn't ogle men OR women, so I just sort of assumed I hadn't found "the right girl" yet. Fantasizing about women didn't seem weird, and I enjoyed watching straight porn. But once I realized I was gay, it was like having all the pieces fall into place. It was so much more real, more RIGHT, than being straight was. It MAY be that's what's happening here. That being with a woman made it clear that you're far more wired to be with women than men. Or perhaps your sexuality is just more fluid than most, and it's currently pointing deep into "gay" territory. Best bet - just go with it. Right now, women are doing it for you. So concentrate on that. Lex
just go with the flow. dont try and froce yourself to be attracted to people you are not attracted to. dont try to worry about your future relationshiips as they havent happened yet. if you get to know a guy and think you could date him then do, if you get to know a girl and think you could date her then do. try not to worry so much it will all sort itself out the more you stop worrying. no one can tell you what your sexaulity is and no one can tell you if youll be with a guy again but my advice is to go with the flow try not to stress about it so much.
