I have found that people seem to have the inability to completely picture gay as being entirely independent of the mainstream gender roles of the opposite gender. I even have a hard time with it. Although I completely know that it should be a category of it's own. I feel as though the idea that "girl meets boy" and "boy meets girl" is so ingrained in us that we associate attraction to women as some thing that must come from male energy etc. . So even when people picture gay men for example they tend to prop up all these stereotypes of women onto them; for example, most people think gay men tend to be super in to fashion, physically "weaker", aesthetically more beautiful, more sensitive and emotionally nurturing etc. The same could be said about lesbians. The archetype for lesbians is that they are very good at sports, more tough, beer-drinking, flannel wearing and slightly more aggresive. Now, ok, I can understand non-lgbtqia folks thinking this...who can really blame them when they don't need to have as much instrospection on gender and sexuality issues as we do...but generally I find that the lgbtqia embraces these stereotypes. Sure, if you happen to be a gay guy or a lesbian and you fit what society calls the "opposite" gender's "roles" and "attributes", then rock on. I definitely believe in freedom of expression....but what I do find interesting that I think that there are even times where the gay community picks up the standards and views set by heterosexuals and put it upon ourselves... I don't know where I'm going about this....just been noticing that people, even the lgbtqia community, tends to view lesbians for example as a female bodied individual with the mindset of a man (or what society calls manly)...there seems to be less distinction between the fact that lesbians are just women attracted to women and the rest is kind of individualized. Similar things can be said about gay men.
I remember when i told some online friends that i played an rpg game that I liked women now these people have seen my picture and no what I looked like because i put it up on the site . And they were just so shocked when i told them . I remember one of my female friends on their saying but your so girly though you like women but i'm so shocked I can't believe this and even the guy i was friends with said he never saw this coming . I also told a friend of mine that i went to school with and she was shocked she said the same thing but different " You don't look like a lesbian and you act so feminine i'm so shocked that you are like women . " I've been even asked by her if i was in a relationship with another woman what would i be the man or the woman and i said just a woman I think me and girlfriend would just be women we're not a man and a woman . we're just women . my friend didn't like that answer but she let it be I'm actually far from the lesbian stereotype i can't play sports to save my life i was even picked last in school because i was terrible , i love make up and enjoy wearing ( not all the time but sometimes ) I do nail art on my own nails pain them and make them pretty (people even thought i had them professionally done when i did it myself ) I like wearing girly clothes , I like getting my hair done . I hate mud and don't like stepping anywhere near it . I use to pissed people of when i was a little girl because i was deemed to girly and made fun of for it . by boys and girls . I like cute things my favorite color is pink .
