I have a question that I'm not sure is strange or not. I'm anrdogyne, have a woman's body and feel like both man and woman on the inside. It's a little confusing some times. When I was younger I thought I was bisexual, being attracted to both women and men. But in the later years I've realized I'm not so sexually attracted to women, as I am able to fall in love with them, and be aesthetically attracted to them. Except today I had a conversation with a good friend about an old memory we share. She's the first woman I was ever in love with, and those feelings came back when we were talking about it. I realized that most of what I felt for her came from the male part of me, and that I even got aroused. But even if the female part of me loves her just as much, that part of me didn't get aroused. So I'm wondering if it's possible that the male part of me is bisexual, while the female part of me is heterosexual? Or am I just seriously messed up in the head?
You certainly aren't messed up. There are many people with fluid gender and expression that notice that their attractions can fluctuate depending on the type of person they are attracted to at any given moment. It can take some time to figure out when and with who you feel the most comfortable and satisfied, but it definitely is not that uncommon.
Yep, you are not alone. :icon_wink I have the same experience and I also identify as androgyne myself. Thanks for the thread because it's something I was also wondering about.
I'm glad I could "man up" for the both of us then. Almost didn't dare tbh. I would like to share something tho. Been thinking about her all day, exploring those feelings, and it's very bittersweet. And thinking back to a specific memory, many years ago now, where we embraced and I kissed her, I've realized today that it was the man in me that did that (even if i wasn't aware of it at the time, I remember thinking I felt like a man in the moment). Since I'm both male and female one part will always be trapped, no matter what I do. But with this memory I feel that I've at least had a small moment where I could express that part of me fully (as full as it gets with only a moment). I feel incredibly fortunate for this, and tho I've always cherished this memory, I treasure it now, holding it in my mind and heart like the most precious possession. And what more is, I talked to her today, not only can I talk to her about these things. But she told me that in that moment she loved me as much as I love her, and she still does. She's always known I'm androgyne, longer then I've known even hehe. And even if she's married, and my sexual attraction to her sadly requires me to have a penis, so there would never be an actual relationship between us, we have this special connection, we simply love each other, and if feels wonderful! Bittersweet, but wonderful nonetheless. Thanks for letting me share this. I made this profile to have an outlet for the other side of me ("den andre" means "the other one" in norwegian), and I'm not much for forums tbh, but today it has been invaluable. So, again, thank you for listening
