First time I've actually posted anything to do with my sexual orientation or told anyone, so here goes I'm a male to female transsexual (born male, transitioning to female) but I'm unsure if I'm a lesbian or if I'm bisexual? As a male back in high school, college, I tried to fit in as best I could, trying to ignore any transgender feelings that I felt. Mainly as I was scared to come out at the time. So this included being straight with being attracted to females. Anyway I couldn't ignore my feelings any more and came out as a transsexual two years ago and have been living full time as a women since then. From avoiding my true feelings for so long I have become confused about my orientation, so I'm unsure who I'm actually attracted to. When I came out as a transsexual I said I was a lesbian as well, as that was easier at the time while I questioned my orientation, before telling anyone just yet. But I look as some guys and sort of think "Am I attracted to men", or maybe I'm trying too hard to be female, to fit the stereotype of a straight relationship, like I did back as a male in school. At the moment, I think I might be attracted to more feminine features and the personality of the person first, instead of if they're male or female, if that makes any sense? But I haven't had a relationship since I came out as trans, to see if this is how I really feel. Sorry about the long post and with it being all over the place, Any advice would be very helpful, Thanks
"At the moment, I think I might be attracted to more feminine features and the personality of the person first, instead of if they're male or female, if that makes any sense?" That makes all KINDS of sense. In fact it's really rather annoying, isn't it? I feel the same a lot of the time. I found myself walking around looking at every guy I came across for a long while, just asking myself "are you attractive? could I be attracted to you?" I did this for months...you know what, doesn't matter how many guys I go past, if I ask myself that specific question I can never get an answer. Not once. (At least, not a 'yes'. Plenty of no!) I stopped myself doing that and started thinking "What about you caught my eye in the first place". It stopped me from over-thinking things. It might be that if you asked yourself the same question you might find something really superficial and you'll find you actually are lesbian...might be that you notice this part of certain guys, and you've found a 'type' and might be 'bi'. It's a small, almost pointless change but it does appear to work...for me at least.
I'm glad that that made sense, Reading your post, made me a bit less confused and I think I have been looking at this the wrong way. Also nice to know I'm not the only one asking myself that question of "I am attracted to that person". But I think I will start asking myself that second question "what caught my eye, etc" instead, since it sounds more useful. The more I think about it I feel like I'm slightly bisexual (or mostly lesbian), attracted mainly to women, but if the right guy came along who was my type (great personality, not too manly) I might be interested. Thanks for your help
