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Wait till highschool or right now?

Discussion in 'Sexual Orientation' started by treespoon, Feb 2, 2014.

  1. treespoon

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    I'm thirteen years old and really questioning my sexuality, right now I've decided that I'm mostly homosexual and bi-romantic.
    I really don't enjoy talking about guys, and all my friends (naturally) assume I'm straight. The topics make me really uncomfortable, and I feel like I'm keeping a HUGE secret from them by not telling them I probably like girls a whole lot more than guys. I get anxious and nervous and my heart rate speeds up and it can ruin a whole day if people start talking about boys or anything sexuality based. It's really bad.
    Should I tell people that I might like girls? Or should I wait until highschool? I'm in eighth grade and I've only got about five months of school left, but if I keep having these anxious days it'll be a pretty miserable five months. Could I get better at controlling it, or should I just tell people?
    My other concern is that in highschool I might not have as many trustworthy friends as I do now. :confused: Help!
     
  2. Projectfabulous

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    I had the same issue as you in 8th grade; I knew I wasn't straight and I couldn't deal with keeping it a secret, however I was still quite unsure. (Plus, I didn't really have that many super close friends to talk to). I became really sure of my sexuality my 9th grade year and didn't come out until 11th grade, so I understand the awkwardness and anxiety. Now why did I tell you this? Because if you really truly have friends you think you can trust and are pretty sure of your sexuality, telling them may be a good idea. Freshman year is rough without worrying about your sexuality. Telling your friends now could strengthen your relationships and make that first day of highschool a lot easier. Plus, you could lose that anxiousness!

    Yet, the decision is entirely up to you. Do whatever feels right to you and what makes yu feel safe and happy.

    Good luck! and I hope I helped even just a little.
     
  3. Bring it

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    Hey, I'm an eighth grader too, and I figured out my sexuality just towards the beginning of the school year, so I totally get where you're at.

    I think if it really bothers you that much when they talk about it, you definitely should tell them. If it comes up as often as you make it sound in your post, then it shouldn't be difficult to find a moment to slip it in that you like girls.

    I don't think that waiting till high school will really accomplish anything you want or need. I recommend that you get it over with sooner, and have it be done when you get to high school.

    I hope this helps. Good luck!
     
  4. TerraNova

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    I'm in almost the same situation as you. I've been questioning my sexuality since I was younger like (10 or so) back then I was really afraid and kept it to myself.
    Now I'm 14 years old, which is of course still pretty young, and I've been working on excepting myself.
    I think the best you can do is be sure of yourself, when you are tell a close trustworthy friend.
    That's what I did and my friend reacted extremely well she actually come out to me after I told her!
    It was so reliving to get it off my chest and feel accepted.
    Slowly I have been telling my close friends one at a time and it keeps getting easier.
    It's probably best to take it slow, even if everyone you've told so far is perfectly ok with it, keep in mind that not everyone will be.

    good luck :slight_smile: I hope this was helpful.
     
    #4 TerraNova, Feb 3, 2014
    Last edited: Feb 3, 2014
  5. treespoon

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    Thank you all! You've soothed my nerves a little bit. :slight_smile: