We were having a chat alone she told me she only likes having sex with girls , she told me she still can't believe i'm a lesbian and thinks I should give men another go , I told her I can't and don't want to .She asked me if I ever done anything with a guy I told her yes I've had oral sex with a guy and hated it plus I wasn't turned on by his man hood . She then told me every woman is like that ,most women don't like giving a guy oral , and Penises are ugly and doesn't turn women on . that I can still like a guy . I told her that I can't connect with them on a romantic level and only see them as friends then she said you just haven't met the right man yet . Plus It was a fling that I had and does not count . She told me that she can't stand her boyfriend and never enjoys having sex with him and only enjoys sex with other women . My friend meets other women on the internet and has sex with them on a regular basis her boyfriend has no idea she does this . My friend said she's open to having a relationship with another woman if they to are serious but she wants to marry a man and told me she's not gay . My friend reminds me of those gay guys that marry women and think their straight because they just have sex with men and also sneek behind their wives back and have sex with men in bath houses or any other setting . I feel sorry for my friend being in such denial and not able to accept herself . But I was pretty upset with her for telling me that she doesn't think I'm a lesbian and I should try men and i will meet the right one . Because I see myself being with only a woman in my future and happy coming home to her and staying with her . I've even had this fantasy as a little girl but pushed it at the back of my head . I really think she's a lesbian she's femme just like me and both of us are a little similar that's why I think one of the reasons she can't accept me as lesbian plus I'm a femme I dress way more femme than her even . the only difference is I want relationships with women and not just sex . Is my friend a lesbian in denial ? and why are some people so scared to be a lesbian what's so bad about being a lesbian ? I could understand being scared not to tell your parents but why is it so bad to some people to be one ?
Yeah it seems like shes forcing herself into a niche that will get her accepted by "the mainstream" but she really loves something/someone else. I feel bad that she thinks she needs to do this for some reason. :/
A lot of bisexual people don't like having sex with one of the sexes, and she was right when she said lots of women don't like penises but can still like men. Sure, she could be a lesbian, but that's her business, not yours. Maybe she just doesn't understand how you can only like one sex, either that or she's pressuring herself to end up with a man. It could go either way, for now you just have to be a friend to her and believe what she says.
No i'm not making the call I think she is but she can label herself however she wants I rather her figure out if she is or not I have no plans on telling her she's labeling herself wrong even if she keeps telling me I am and still doesn't believe i'm a lesbian . ---------- Post added 9th Feb 2014 at 11:27 AM ---------- I don't really plan on telling her she's labeling wrong or that I think she's a lesbian I mean she told me to my face that she thinks I'm still bi and can't believe i'm a lesbian . I'm just worried about her that's all i don't want her to force herself but I want her to figure her sexuality out herself . than have me tell her . It's just she reminds me of myself at that age and I just cared so much you know . I just want to be there for her .
I agree with the others that It's her call to make about her identity. Maybe she is bisexual and just doesn't enjoy sex with some guys, or doesn't find penises attractive. However, it was wrong of her to tell you that you haven't met the right guy or to deny that you don't have interests in men. Friend or not, I would have punched her hard in the face for even trying to bring up that devaluing bullshit.
Yeah I was pretty upset she couldn't accept me as lesbian . But I would not tell her that I think she is lesbian because I don't know all that's going on with her you know . I know it's not my call I was just wondering but I'm not gonna say anything even though she's saying a lot to me like your to girly to be gay or I don't see you as gay .
