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No I idea what I am (gay,straight, bi) cause of weird fetish

Discussion in 'Sexual Orientation' started by MainL, Feb 12, 2014.

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  1. MainL

    MainL
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    Hi, I am 18 years old and I am new to this site. Not knowing my orientation has been killing me for a while now, and I feel like I won't really know until I get into bed with someone. Just a disclaimer: The fetish I'm about to explain is going to be very strange, and probably ordifficult for some people to understand. I'v heard of other people that have it, I've just personally never seen anything posted about on this site.

    Anyway, here goes:

    I started getting sexual feelings kind of late, not until around 7th/8th grade. At this time, I was literally just looking up videos of looking up girls skirts. This was all it took to turn me on at the time. I had sexual feeling for that, but then things got weird. I started going to sites where there were drawings of furry creatures (wolves, dogs, etc.) smashing cities. Then it got to a point where I got aroused by watching these giant animals eat tiny versions of these animals. I found out later these were called macrophilia and voreaphilia. I would always picture one of these creature being one of my male, or sometimes female, friends. I continued to masturbate to these types of things for the next 2/3 years. Even though I had though girls were pretty in high school, I never looked at regular porn and really still haven't since. Then, around sophomore year of high school, I started to get turned on by the thought of my male friend's feet on my face. This one was a little more "normal" I guess, but it was really hard to contain myself whenever one of my friends took his shoes/socks off and I could smell his feet, and it still kind of is. I also want to say that the though of me sucking his dick or putting his penis inside me did not and still doesn't turn me on to this day. Then, around junior year, I would start to get aroused whenever one of my friends would burp or fart around me. I would start to go online and look for videos and stories of boys around my age (18) burping and farting in each other's faces (not sensually), and this still continues to this day. Whenever one of my male friends burps or farts around me, my heart skips a beat, and I have to try not to look aroused. It's literally torturing me. I want to reiterate that I had no desire to engage in sexual intercourse with any of these guys, whether it was oral or anal. The time I was attracted to them is when they would burp and fart.

    I can honestly say that I have no idea which point in my childhood brought me to like these kinds of things. I know this definitely did not help my case, but when I was in each one of these fetishes, I would masturbate 3-4 times a day without thinking about it. I had completely desensitized myself to any "normal" kinds of porn; I don't think I went on PornHub once. This is because I was in high school and never really felt pressure to have sex. I'm now a freshman in college, and I still don't really feel that pressure, but the opportunity will definitely come sooner rather than later. I have tried to stop masturbating and resensitize myself, but the longest I went was only about 2 weeks (which was about a month ago) until I "relapsed" again. Today, I had also relapsed after not doing it for 5 days, which is why I write this now.

    Now, about my relationship with girls:

    I have always thought girls were hot, good-looking, my thought process is that I had masturbated so much to the other stuff that I ended up having no sex drive toward these girls whatsoever. Recently, I found that I am more attracted to girl's asses than before. If I looked at a girl's ass or a girls playing with her ass for long enough, I would get aroused.I just don't know if I'll become aroused when I finally get in bed with a girl in real life. I don't know if it's because I'm gay, or if it's because I had become so addicted to my weird fetishes that regular porn meant nothing to me. I apologize for how strange this post is, but this is what I've been given. I going to try to abstain from masturbating again and see if that helps. Please let me know what you think, it would help a lot, and I would really appreciate it, thank you.
     
    #1 MainL, Feb 12, 2014
  2. MainL

    MainL
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    I know the people who view this probably think I'm trolling but I swear to God I'm not, I just wish I could figure out how this happened to me.
     
    #2 MainL, Feb 12, 2014
  3. duende84

    duende84
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    Hi there

    I read through your whole post until I saw your "think I'm trolling) post. I have no reason to doubt your fetishes and your concern why you have these urges. But I cannot give you a clear answer.

    What I can tell you from my own experience is that I have been raised in a "normal, vanilla" household with no exposure to honosexuality yet I am gay. That is who I discovered I am though years of painful agony and self-doubt.

    You are not alone and you surely have come to the right place to get some new perspective on the personal situation you find yourself in. Welcome to EC!
     
    #3 duende84, Feb 12, 2014
    Arianna240985 likes this.
  4. Simple Thoughts

    Simple Thoughts
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    Well you've got a half-luck sort of thing going on at the moment xD

    As it so happens that two of the things you mentioned also apply to me, so I can feel you to an extent.

    I'm a bit of a furry myself, though I tend to not be all that super vocal about it. It's one of those things that I really don't think people would generally understand so I try to avoid letting it become the subject of discussion. For you though, I'll ignore my own rule because you seem like you need someone to talk to :slight_smile:

    Second thing, I'm rather fond of feet myself. I'm not obsessed with feet, but I do find them arousing. This one you shouldn't be too worried about, of the things in fetish land this one is fairly common I believe. At least it's not out there enough to be completely unsettling to people.

    So if you feel a need to talk about either of those I'd be happy to discuss them with you.

    To the later part. I would have to say that you're probably over thinking things. If you find women attractive in porn, odds are when you get the bedroom you'll be fine. Well as long as you don't get nervous. :slight_smile:

    So try and relax, and I'll try my best to help you out with this.

    Oh and about your other fetishes, don't worry so much. Everyone has their thing that gets them excited. It's no big deal, and there's not a need to feel ashamed of it.
     
    #4 Simple Thoughts, Feb 12, 2014
  5. Hopefilled

    Hopefilled
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    Whatever melts your butter and harms no one else is ok.

    Acceptance in the end has to be self-validated:slight_smile:
     
    #5 Hopefilled, Feb 12, 2014
  6. bkhan3101

    bkhan3101
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    this is literally me however i wasn't as sexual as you with girls i am sexually attracted to girls yet i have this fetish with guys burping and farting but have no inclination of wanting sexual interactions with a guy (obviously i can tell when a guy is hot but not in a sexual way just because i have working eyes) i have hocd too though which means my brain is using EVERYTHING it can to convince me I'm gay when I'm not. Maybe its normal to have a gay fetish as a straight guy???
     
    #6 bkhan3101, Oct 10, 2017
  7. Blackangel

    Blackangel
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    Fetishes are just that. Fetishes. I have a few myself, some that I'm too embarrassed to admit to. One of mine that I can admit to is that I like to watch women masturbate, preferably by fingering themselves. That may be chauvinistic in some peoples eyes, but I can't help it. Another that is extremely common is eyes. I totally melt if the person has the right eyes.

    But, as already stated, as long as it doesn't infringe on someone elses right to be turned on by what they want and it doesn't hurt anyone, then let the energy flow. You're not weird or trolling or anything. I can see that you're confused, but we all go thru that.
     
    #7 Blackangel, Oct 14, 2017
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