This is the short version of my story!! I had childhood troubles as a kid and bounced from my family to a foster home, and then to living with my grandparents during high school. During this time (ages 13-17) I dated this girl because she was the only one who stuck by me through it all. I truly identified with being a lesbian. Our relationship had SEVERE control issues and i felt as if I wasn't allowed to do anything or have any friends besides her. After four years, I thought I was going to be with her forever. We broke up and it took me almost a year to be okay. When I was 18, I met my boyfriend. We have been together 2 years now. I love him and I think he is so sexy. He satisfies me sexually most of the time. But I still miss the feeling of being with a girl. We're very open, he knows about my past and knows I still have urges to be with a girl again. He doesn't want a threesome though. I wouldn't mind, but I would like to be intimate with a girl again. He really does not mind as long as i don't have feelings for her. But I can't just have sex with someone who I don't have feelings for! I am super picky about females and super cautious about stds and whatnot. I seriously like girls who are almost barbie perfect-with a goth twist. But I am attracted to a dyke lesbian in my chemistry class. She is nothing like my ideal woman, but I think she is sexy! She has a girlfriend, but I'm confused as why I am attracted to her. I don't think I'll ever find the perfect girl to fill the gap that would be willing to work around/with my current relationship. I guess this is more of a vent for me, but tips would be helpful!
Well I don't have that many tips but I would say sometimes what you think you want isn't what you want haha. It's great that you and your boyfriend are completely open and the best thing to do is keep talking about it and see what happens.
