Help me I'm not sure if I'm bi or Lesbian or what. Looking back on my life so far I've been interested in girls without knowing it. However a few years ago I had a major crush on a boy. And I'm not even attracted to him at all now. So i don't know what I am and I'm afraid to come out to people as LGBTQ until I know. On top of that I'm in love with my best friend. Shes so beautiful and smart and I love her more than anything but I don't think she feels the same way. Shes never said anything bad about LGBTQ but shes really religious and stuff and she might not support me if I tell her. Should I just tell her and get it over with?
If she is honestly your best friend she will support you no matter what. I came out to my best friend and felt the same way, since I met her at Christian school haha. Religion shouldn't matter here, I would know I'm a very strong Christian and I'm gay. But back on the point, I would say do it. Get it over with, it will be a huge weight off your shoulders and I'm sure she'll be perfectly fine with it. Go for it!
For your friend, I would advise you to mention an LGBTQ news article or something sometime - see what her standpoint on the subject is, and test the waters. If she reacts negatively, she's not gonna like you coming out, and while everyone says you should just dump her if she doesn't like you for who you are, if you have a huge crush on her, that's obviously easier said than done... But even if she is LGBT-friendly, it's freaky for anyone to be told that someone has a crush on them - especially if it's someone they consider an extremely close friend. So yeah, awkward situation. Either way, I would advise trying not to tell her you have a crush on her immediately. The other thing you've mentioned that has piqued my interest - you say you had a major crush on a guy. What sort of attraction did you have - physical, romantic, emotional, sexual, or some kind of combination? If there was a sexual component, was it that you were be willing to be sexual to make him happy, or that you really desired intimate contact with him? Also, did you know him/was he your friend, or someone you admired from afar? Depending on the situation, I suspect you may have been in a similar situation to mine - the one thing that was allowing me to convince myself I was anything but gay. There was a guy who I did (and in a way, still do) care deeply about and for. I wanted to be near him, and to talk with him, and to make him happy, but in my case, the only sexual things I ever considered with him were to make him happy with the relationship - never anything that I expected to get any real joy out of. I thought I had a crush ob him, but after a long period of deep and thoughtful pondering, I have realized that while I had a strong emotional bond with him, I wasn't in love with him. Regardless, good luck figuring things out.
