I'm still confused about sexuality but I pinned it down to the earliest time I ever really started feeling attraction to the same sex. I was in tenth grade and this girl that was on also on the track team on the school laid down on my stomach like a head rest when I was lying in the shade. I didn't really question it at the time but I noticed I started crushing on her without even knowing it. I'm pretty sure I'm not jealous of her or want to be like her. She is definitely not someone I would idolize to be. I want to be with her romantically. When ever I go on facebook and see her picture with her boyfriend I always seem to get tick off seeing the picture and think to myself "I wish that was me" or "she deserves better". I started feeling the same way to a close friend of mine and the feeling have shifted a bit more toward her. When she had a boyfriend I was secretly jealous and I noticed I would accidently slip and show my anger for a bit toward her but quickly stop myself. I'm not sure if this this is being bisexual, bicurious, or just a plain fantasy. I tried other peoples advice by thinking well can you picture yourself marrying them? I can picture doing everything with them but I'm not sure about love. I couldn't even picture loving a guy until I actually fell in love with one so it seems hard to predict. I can't really picture having sex with them either so I'm not so sure what else I can picture or do to predict or get closer to the answer. I also have a weird dilemma though. Some days I would look at a guy and think I am definitely straight from looking at this...and convince myself it is just a phase or something and question if there was even an attraction toward women. The attract would go away sometimes. Sometimes I don't even think about it and I would start thinking about being with a girl again and look at guys and not even be attracted to them at all. I just have times where the attract of one sex is there but my attraction for the other is completely gone for a bit. I've also caught myself staring at girls butts without even realizing. I have an attraction to girls to a certain extent but the attraction is not exactly strong enough for me to label it as a sexual attraction. I'M SO CONFUSED! Is this just fantasy? I'm not really sure. I'm such an oblivious person and pretty much barely question anything so even when I knew I liked guys I didn't give it much thought. I knew for sure when I liked the guy when I was 12. The second guy I ever liked was my ex boyfriend. Now I'm 20 and that is really only 2 people I have ever liked in my life. Everyone else was just a crush. Even counting those crushes there wasn't much of them. I guess I don't get attracted to people easily? It's even hard to think about at my history about people I've liked because there hasn't even been much for guys and I'm sure I like guys... I'm so confused...I'm just rambling now. Does it seem like I'm actual attracted to girls? or is this a fantasy?
Heh, reminds me of me. I'm gonna have to say the generic non-answer and tell you that only you can choose what to label yourself... but when I say that you remind me of myself, well, I consider myself bi, and I'm not attracted to both sexes at the same time - I swing one way or the other, often moment to moment. Yeah, it can be awkward and confusing. I hope you can figure yourself out.
Hey I would say you probably are bisexual. It doesn't mean it has to be a 50:50 split. Try not to put too much pressure on yourself, you have accepted you have at least some attraction to girls so why not just see what happens. Can you imagine yourself kissing a girl?
It sounds to me like you'd fall under the category of "bisexual," but how (or even if) you choose to label yourself is solely up to you. Give it some time and see where the feelings go. And just because you're bi doesn't mean you're attracted to both sexes all the time; you can have times where you're attracted to guys or girls only. Sexuality is a fluid thing; there's no one way to define it, and it's always changing and fluctuating. Just give yourself some time and see where things go.
I have kissed a girl before but it was for spin the bottle...I'm sure that doesn't count. I can picture it but at the same time it grosses me out. I'm thinking that I might be in denial or I can't except the fact that I might enjoy it?...Maybe it actually does gross me out...I'm really confused on how I feel about that actually.
If you got up one day and said to yourself I'm going to let myself be gay today how would that make you feel.
