I work with a lesbian girl who is a stud. We recently started hanging out about a month ago. I went to her apartment and we drank and watched t.v. It was really fun. Then we went 2 weeks without hanging out outside of work. But we sit right behind each other at work so we were still talking and hanging out at work. Then we hung out again on a saturday night. It got late so she said I should stay the night and asked me if I want to sleep on the couch or if I'd be ok sleeping with her in the bed. I said I'd sleep with her. That night we ended up cuddling and it was really nice. The next weekend we hung out on saturday and since we were now cuddle buddies, we watched tv in her room on her bed and we ended up having sex. We did it again in the morning and hung out all day on sunday. I spent the night again and we had sex 2 more times. But in the morning she said we cant do all the extra stuff anymore and that we will still be friends and do all the things we were talking about doing together. Her reasoning for this is because she has a commitment phobia and i am a relationship person and she doesnt want to hurt me, and because my ex works with us also and her and him are friends. And she doesnt want to hurt her friendship with my ex. And because she is "out" and I am not (but I would have no problem being out if we were to continue dating). And she said that if you have to hide something, then you shouldnt be doing it. Referring to the fact that we were hiding what was going on between us from our co workers. I know that nothing serious would come out of dating her. We are not meant to be together. But the sex was awesome and I think it would be really fun to casually date her. Is there anything I can do to change her mind?
Probably not, and I honestly don't think it's a good idea to try and change her mind. She gave you several valid reasons why she doesn't think a relationship is a good idea right now. Maybe things will change down the road and she'll be more open to it then, but for now I wouldn't push for anything.
