I know labels aren't needed for everyone but for me I need to know.I love my partner who's male but do not desire to have sex or foreplay or oral with.Though I will only get off with him if it's over porn or if I've asked him to talk about him having sex with a woman the thought of imaging a woman get off excites me but straight after I am finished I feel so wrong like I shouldn't had done it like that but it's more so guilt as getting off with him that I feel wrong about it and I don't know why.I haven't always had this feeling but in saying that I never really have craved sex I would just do it.For the past few years I have been noticing women so much I've never looked at either gender since these past years of questioning.I get a nagging feeling that tells me I'm a lesbian but find myself trying to make myself look at a man I guess to reassure myself I don't know but I can notice an attractive man but it's usually when I'm testing myself to see if I still have attraction towards men.I look and think he looks nice and when I try to imagine sex with a man other than my partner to see if maybe it's a physical thing I feel as if it's very robotic I don't know of it's because men come off as more aggressive but I can appreciate a good looking guy but cannot imagine the sex part it feels as of I'm violating my body like rape like I dunno I find the thought of the penis disgusting the penetration part puts me off but I do get slightly turned about the thought of having sex even though I don't want it so confusing.I can imagine doing everything with a woman and actually be in a relationship with one but I am not one who is comfortable on everyone knowing.I still refer to my fiancée as my partner I don't use the term husband it doesn't fit right but everyone refers to him as that.I love him but don't desire him and it's crushing my soul I can't stop with these daily fantasies of women constantly imaging what it'd be like I'm afraid I maybe getting hocd I've always liked women but now it's just all on my mind I can't think straight and if I try it feels forced. What am i?
Sometimes label are important and very valuable, especially at a time when you're figuring out who you truly are and need to be able to discuss it with others. I would say you are almost certainly bisexual and possibly a lesbian. I'm so sorry it's causing you pain and confusion. Have you talked to your partner about your feelings at all?
