I'm an 18 year old girl, and I've been confused about it for years, since I was at least 10 or 11. I came out as bisexual when I was 13. But it didn't feel like a weight had really come off my chest. People think I'm gay when we first meet, but that doesn't really prove anything I guess. Here's where it starts getting difficult... I've had a boyfriend for nearly 2 years. And there hasn't been any confusion about who I am for a while now, at least not until just recently. I can have sex with him, and kiss him and do all of that, but it doesn't do it for me all at the same time, he thinks it's him and it isn't. I've spoken to a gay friend of mine and she said I'm probably bisexual with a preference for women, and it sounds plausible. But at the same time, when I'm with men it doesn't seem right. I'm difficult in bed with them. I've experimented with women, and I've had no trouble having an orgasm. I'm not jumping to conclusions or anything, but it's starting to feel like I might be a lesbian. I could really use some advice, as soon as possible. I can't go on like this anymore, I can't keep being confused about what I want, especially if I'm in a relationship. It's hurting us both and he doesn't even realise it. :/ Please help me. :help: I need to sort this out, it's driving me crazy. :bang:
Hey! My advice would be if you're not happy in your relationship, end it, no matter how you feel about your orientation. There's no point in staying if you're unhappy! About your orientation, don't jump to find yourself a label. A label can be comforting, I know, but take your time. Tons of lesbians identify as lesbian and occasionally have flings or relationships with men. If you are comfortable identifying as bi/lesbian, go ahead. There are no concrete rules for either. You're probably bi with a preference for women, but only you can decide! Take some time to explore and relax, or talk to a friend about your emotions. It can really help take a load off your shoulders.
Oh no, I'm not saying that I'm not happy in my current relationship. My boyfriend is a great guy, he fills me with confidence and he's fun to be around. No other guy in my life has ever been this genuine. I've known him since I came out as bi. It's just that when it comes to sex and other emotional stuff that would come with a relationship, women stand out more to me. (I don't know how to explain myself better than this, I apologize) Thank you so much for your advice, I'll have to speak to my boyfriend about it. He's helped me with so many things in my life so I'm sure this is no different. It might affect our future together, but he just wants me to be happy above all.
I can identify with this completely! I feel exactly the same as you, I'm having some struggles with my sexually at the moment. Questioning whether I'm bisexual, lesbian or straight and this was the same for me, I loved my ex in a way but I never had that strong emotional bond and sex has never satisfied me with me a man. I mean I enjoy it but it never makes me orgasm, I've never been with a women before but something tells me it would be a lot more pleasurable. I finished things with my ex as I was really confused! I haven't met a girl I'd like to take things further with as I don't want to mess someone around but if the sex and connection was better I'd probably want to keep it that way
