I just don't know. I am a 24 years old guy and I have been questioning myself a lot. First thing, my libido is messed up. I don't get full erections, I am rarely turned on and no psychologist, psychiatrist or andro doc has been useful to sort this problem out. But let's talk about the issue for which I am here. I just don't know where to put myself. - when I masturbate, I think about girls I know, and sometimes men (who I don't know). I can get off quickly to both, and the speed or pleasure associated with varies with my real life experience: for example, when I have sexual experiences with girl, I get off quickier thinking about girls. There are periods in which I can get off quickier with men. - in pornography, I ve watched all kind of things. It's usually straight stuff, but sometimes it can be really anything, from dogs screwing girls to gay adverts. I don't know if that counts, but I can have a physical response watching nudes of girls, but not with guys. But with stimulation and some fantasy I can easily get off to both. - like I said, I have some form of ed/low libido and my real life sexual experiences with girls have always been full of anxiety ("why doesn't it get up?"). There have been times in which I have enjoyed them, when my penis would cooperate. I have only two experiences with men: the first one was totally disappointing, I just could not feel anytging. The second one was good sex: I had no erection (my ed is with both sexes) but with men is not strictly necessary. So I enjoyed the sex, but I was not aroused by the guy's body, except for his, ehm, genitals. I didn t want to kiss him, while with girls is different: I like their bodies and appearance. - in my everyday life, I don't check out anybody. In order to find people arousing, I have to be somehow in contact with them. I have a lot of male friends, while I can't have female friends, simply because I always end in wanting them for more than a friendship. I have never had these attractions towards men. - if that is not strange enough: until I was 15 years old I had a normal libido and I got madly excited about girls, with no ed problems. I had same sex fantasies but not strong as straight ones. - I don't know if that matters, but I have developed crushes only over girls. Like, I wanted to sleep with them, kiss them, holding them... the emotional part of sexuality. So I don't know, really. It's pretty much messed up! What do you think I am?
To clarify, here's how my physical attraction evolves: 1) I am uninterested in the person. She can be physically beautiful, but I don't care 2) I actually talk to the person. If there is feeling, I begin to want the person more close to me, physically. It can be strong. I want to hold her, kiss her, etc 3) If I feel reciprocated, I can have sexual fantasy towards the person,as well as romantic feelings. I have never had these attractions towards men, only with girls. I don't kknow. It's puzzling.
I think it's natural to feel sexually aroused by both genders. It's a male dominance establishment thing as well.. a lot plays a role in your arousal. Don't work yourself up about it.. you're sexually fluid and comfortable with your sexuality. You sound like a "straight" male with confidence/comfort in what he wants.
