I guess I could say I'm bi. I'll probably never come out and pretty sure I will end up marrying a woman, but lately I've been confused. I've known that I had a slight attraction to men since high school. A part of me thinks its because my dad died when I was 12 and I have some kind of "daddy complex" that you hear of girls getting in the same situation. I used to mess around with a friend in high school but it always felt really weird afterwards and I always regretted it. I really enjoy having sex with girls and the thought of having anal sex with a guy disgusts me. I met a guy about a year and a half ago we quickly became best friends. He is now my roommate and we do everything together. But in the past few months I've started having a strong attraction to him both sexually and romantically. I'm constantly checking him out and I get really jealous when he brings a girl home. I don't understand why I have these feelings or what to do about them. I've gone back and forth about telling him that I have a slight attraction to guys (about a 1 or 2 on the Kinsey scale). I don't think he would move out or quit being my friend if I told him, but I don't want him to feel weird around me or act any different. Any advice?
Honestly I'd keep it to myself just because you're roommates and it would suck it make tha situation weird I hooked up with my roommate and now we don't talk to each other it's very awkward and I get jealous when she brings her bf over unless you feel the feelings would be reciprocated id just keep it as your dirty little secret
I would keep your thoughts to yourself, especially if you are still confused about your own feelings. Maybe you should try testing the waters with him, if you think you have a chance with him.
I would agree with the other two posters. I'm in the same position. HUGE crursh on my roommate but I know he's straight and I respect that.
Do you REALLY think in yourself kissing him? Or having any kind of physical contact? If the answer is no, and it disgusts you... Well, i think you should keep it to yourself, onde day or another you'll forget about that.
Not liking the comments so far... The comments so far are not addressing an urgent point. There aren't any scientific research linking sexual orientation to a complex or trauma. You can verify with the APA if you want, you'll be told the same thing and it should be on their website (unless it's the psychologist one rather than the psychiatrist one, I always forget, but they both agree anyway). It's a misleading belief primarily pushed by pseudo-professionals waving a PhD they got in biblical literature and calling themselves "Dr. blablabla - Psychotherapist", it's bollocks. What I'm more curious about is the nature of the interaction you had with your high school friend. The regret (guilt?) could be internalized homophobia, not uncommon, albeit annoying to deal with. You are somewhat attracted to men as you've said, nothing wrong with that obviously (men are really good looking after all ), but it's something that may take time to get used to, especially if you've considered yourself primarily straight all your life and then you find out that you're not exactly what you thought you were. It's a slow process towards acceptance (5 stages of grief), but so long as you understand that there's nothing wrong with it and you're not trying to fight it, you'll eventually come to accept it. Well for one you could try to find out how he feels about LGBT. The subject comes up every so often on the news if you're in the US. I can't promise a positive response, but at the very least you won't be exposing yourself in the event of a bad response. If the response is good and you trust him enough, you could also open up to him about questioning your sexuality (not necessarily right after) and go from there.
