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Why can't I refer to myself as lesbian?

Discussion in 'Sexual Orientation' started by rmds, Mar 20, 2014.

  1. rmds

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    I don't know why, but it sounds so goofy to me. Even when I say it to myself, I feel silly. Almost like it's a joke...something about it just doesn't feel right.

    Is it just the label that's bothering me? Or am I just not used to this yet?
     
  2. An0n

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    It probably feels weird because we don't introduce ourselves as straight before we discover ourselves so it feels odd to announce it when you don't follow the social norms.
     
  3. Ruthven

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    Well if it's just the word itself maybe you could just refer to yourself as gay? Or have no label I don't know.
     
  4. stocking

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    Your just not use to it yet. What I did to help myself with this problem was look at myself in the mirror andsay l'm a lesbian when no one was at home. I think the reason some women have trouble calling themselves lesbian is because of the negativity with word lesbian
     
  5. Soaring

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    My sibling had the same problem, back when they still identified as mostly female, that is. Now they identify as gender fluid, so I guess that was probably what was causing some of the problem in their case.

    If you don't like using the word lesbian you could just call yourself gay or homosexual. People don't seem to object to females using the term "gay" since it can be used for anyone who experiences same sex attraction, and it seems like no one really seems to think of it as strange. Homosexual sounds a bit too technical to some people, but you can definitely still use it. Of course there are other terms you can use too. For example, you could just call yourself homo instead of homosexual, or if you want you could just call yourself queer since it's kind of a coverall term.

    It may be that you will just get used to calling yourself lesbian, but if using that term for yourself makes you uncomfortable I don't see any reason why you should have to use it.
     
  6. rainmustfall

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    what stocking suggested is a good idea. I know when I was coming to terms with my gender issues I had to do something similar, although I couldn't actually *look* at myself in the mirror so I would just say things in the shower.
     
  7. rmds

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    I think it has more to do with the label than it does with the word "lesbian." Because it also feels weird to say, "I'm homosexual," or "I'm gay." BUT... it feels refreshingly easy to say, "I LIKE GIRLS!"

    Why do there have to be labels for sexuality? Why does there have to be a name for what you are? Why can't you just say I like boys, or I like girls, or I like all people. I think I get hung up on the fact that we have to CALL it something.

    Just my two cents. And I am spawning this into another thread because now it's got me thinking... lol.
     
  8. Tetra

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    I totally agree with this, hence my "orientation" on EC. "I like girls" is just something about you, not WHO you are. "Lesbian" is a harder word to spit out, because along with the word comes the stigma and negativity that was pushed on us for so long.
     
  9. rainmustfall

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    yeah I have to admit, saying I am a lesbian always sounds weird to me. Usually when people ask I just say I am queer as a three dollar bill and leave it at that, lol.
     
  10. rmds

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    I'm glad I'm not the only one who feels this way. I'm just hoping it will get easier?
     
  11. WallWeed

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    Same here! I've said that I'm gay, but I've never used lesbian and never intend to. Part of that stems from not being strictly cis-female, but I never liked the word regardless. It bears a negative, falsely stereotypical stigma that I just can't get past.
     
  12. BelleFromHell

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    When I came out to my godmom late last year, I found it really uncomfortable and embarassing when I said the word "lesbian", and to this day I have trouble saying that word. It could be that you haven't accepted who you are 100%, I know I sure as hell haven't.
     
  13. ChromeNerd

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    I'm in a strange situation. I don't feel that comfortable calling myself gay or lesbian out loud. I don't even feel comfortable saying that I like girls. I did feel comfortable saying I was bisexual when I was younger, but I don't feel comfortable with the idea of being bisexual. I feel the most comfortable saying that I'm not straight because most people assume that I mean I'm gay anyways.
     
  14. stocking

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    but you guys don't have to do it out loud maybe just say it privately and later on you might get use to it .
     
  15. SassySakia

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    I don't like the label... Lesbian.
    I'm not not a lesbian.
     
  16. MyLittleWorld

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    If people asks me I always say I like girls. Word lesbian is okey for me but there is something not right. I noticed straight guys relate lesbians to feminists and here we have so much hate going on... just a thought