So I think everyone's gay and has had "regular" same sex sexual experiences. I'm really looking for anyone who's going through this idk if im crazy or just severely in the closet. 1. I think being gay is just something "straight" people push onto "gay" people. All of my guy friends have had same sexual experiences but until I realixed this all of them were extremely homophobic so I feel as of the "gay" people just cant wrap their heads around what being "gay" really is. Which is really having way more same sex experience then other se experiences. 2. I feel like as if every time I'm in public someone can identify me as being gay. Like if anyone laughs or is talking loud I feel like they are talking or laughing as me being gay. I even divert from the convo I'm having just to listen to context clues about them thinking I was gay. It can be out to dinner or just walking by a random group of ppl. 3. i feel the people who are gay are just in power (obama, romney, rand paul) and have realixed what i have to keep actual gay people in the closet. I think homophobics are the real gay people just being hateful towards others. I grew up thinking being gay was wrong so idk if its just something instilled in me and I'm realixzing its not bad especially since I kn ow more straight ppl enjoy gay experiences. So am I bat shit crazy or am I gay?
Being gay doesn't mean you've had sexual experiences with the same sex, it means you're sexually attracted to the same sex. As for sexual experiences and straight people, I don't really think most straight people have had a gay experience. You'll learn that same sex experiences are the minority of people.
In your second point, do you mean to say that you feel as though when people are laughing or talking, they are laughing or talking about your sexuality in a negative way? Like you feel like they are all accusing you of being gay? I just want to be clear before I give you a response. If this is how you feel, I completely understand. I tend to avoid certain conversations with friends because I am afraid that they will be able to figure out that I am a lesbian.
I'm confused. Are you saying Obama, Romney and Rand Paul are gay? Because I've seen absolutely no evidence of it. I can't know what's in their heads, but Obama certainly seems happily married.
What you are saying is most misunderstood thing about lgb indivudals. Being gay, lesbian or bisexual ain't about who you sleep with it is about who you are capable of fall in love with. I remember when I was little I can get erection being physically close to a girl. Tho never wanted to hug or in some cases hump one of the girls, it was all boys for me. I accepted I am gay, even if I knew before I attracted to males, when I fall in love with a boy. Before that I was thinking it is temporary. Not really related but here is my childhood prayer - God, please let this fun with boys end at 15... Umm... 20 when I go to military service then I can get married with a girl like mom after service. (At that age 20 was too far away for me. I was even thinking 30 is too old and I would die before getting that "old") For second point, welcome to the gay paranoia. I had same feeling whenever I felt guilty for being gay. Also as I was my boyfriends first guy, they told me they felt like everyone know we just had sex and looking at them knowingly. It is all in your head. Be more secure about yourself as it is somehow related to low self esteem/love. Love yourself and no matter what your sexual identity is you are still a person. Sexuality is only tiny fragment of your being. And for last one. I think homophobics can be like that for plenty of reasons, self doubts about sexuality, religious upbringing, family values, society... that seeds planted every moment and every day of their lives by society. Gay jokes, slurs, hate speech... Children hear those and they think it is "normal" to be that way. This is why most of us had that tons of psychological problems when growing up. Those invisible walls are the hardest to take down/break through. Video time: Prayers for Bobby - Speech I could go for Children will listen by Barbra Streisand but didn't want to torture you with Barbra song.
