Hi, I would really appreciate your advice as I don't have anyone I can discuss this with. I am married with children and have always thought I was straight. This was until I started to fall for a woman I worked with. She is 25 years older than me, but we immediately hit it off and were always chatting at work and sending each other emails (some times in the evenings). She was off sick from work for a while, but I visited her and our friendship grew closer and closer. I met her partner (male) and we started going round for dinner as two couples. We both moved jobs, but have remained friends. We now email, text or speak on the phone most days and have become best friends. She completely trusts me and shares things with me she has never told anyone before. The problem is that I am completely in love with her. I wake up in the night thinking of her and am constantly arranging the next time we can meet up. If I don't hear from her for a day or so I get paranoid she doesn't want to know me any more. I really don't know if she feels the same way, but she is pretty traditional in her views and has only ever been with men. I have never experienced intense friendship like this before and I can't work out if what this means. I don't fancy any other women, just her and I'm not even sure it's sexual, but I would love her to hug me and hold me. We got drunk the other night and we linked arms (initiated by me) and she didn't put up any objection. I would really appreciate your thoughts on what is really confusing me and taking of my life.
i get it, there are some people who you just can't try because they don't have the same sexual orientation as you. and to be honest, it really does suck! but my guess is (please don't take this the wrong way!) you have maybe just gotten really close to her and really want to be around her because she may fuffil something about you. Hope this helped!
Thanks for your advice. You are right and I would hate to ruin what has become a really intense friendships. It is just so different to what I have experienced before with friends. One day she sent me an email with about 20 kisses on it. I would never put that many on to just a friend. Sometime I wonder whether she just sees me like a daughter, but I definitely don't see her as a mother, she is lovely in all ways and makes me feel special. It's so nice to know someone is thinking about me and cares for me too. I just wish I wasn't so obsessed with her because it is taking over my life and making it difficult to concentrate on the rest of my life.
i think its great that people have these feelings for each other! but sadly the other party may not have the same feelings. . but she may have lost a daughter or someone else who she regarded similar to a daughter and she would then be subconsciously be looking for someone to fill that gap in her heart. that makes your relationship with her just that so much more special! and twice as worth fighting for!
