hey guys, I would be really grateful if you could give me some advice so I've had a crush on my best friend for the longest time- like years and years, she was a lesbian too -before she started getting boyfriends, and I even told her that I liked her but it I guess nothing was ever going to happen in her eyes. The thing is I still get jealous all the time because she is always dating- she literally can't stay single, and I don't know if its just painful because I'm just jealous - but she also goes for all the wrong people! her boss who has kids and a family and is 30 years older- I try not to judge but hes not even nice to her so I just can't support her on this, shes cheated over and over and over, and as her best friend she always wants to hear my opinion and I can't lie to her that I approve! she always gets so offended when I tell the truth but then still pushes me for an answer. I get mad at her, then I still have a crush on her, then I miss her, then I get frustrated again! I just feel like I don't understand- I don't want to be too judgeworthy but she doesnt give me a choice but answer and she gets mad at her friend who says she doesnt want to hear about her lovelife. I'm going away to uni soon too- well hopefully so I can't get into an argument and fall out with her- I don't want to but at the same time I can't hold my tongue or lie. Do you think I'm just feeling jealous because I want her? I love her to pieces too as a friend but in a way getting away from her at uni may be the best thing for me because I'm just so in love with her its torture! especially when shes telling me about her boyfriends/girfriends whatever.
I know it can be hard to see people you care about behave like this, but at the end of the day, it's her life and she needs to learn from her own mistakes. It's not really your place to try and coerce her in to doing anything, even if you believe it to be in her best interests. As her friend all you can really do is be there for her when she needs you. Maybe, one day she will see the light, but she had to come to that in her own way and time. I understand it's hard for you because you like her in that special way, but if she does not share those feelings then all you can do is accept that you'll always be friends and try to be there for her. However, I do hope things work out between you. Happy days
