1. This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this site, you are agreeing to our use of cookies. Learn More.

99% sure I'm gay, but...

Discussion in 'Sexual Orientation' started by gaythrowaway, Apr 14, 2014.

  1. gaythrowaway

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Apr 14, 2014
    Messages:
    4
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Not out at all
    I think I'm gay, I mean, I find guys hot and get attracted/aroused to them, I'd love to have a boyfriend, and obviously women don't do anything for me, I mean, I could think a girl is pretty but not more than that (probably just lile straight women do).

    I don't know what to do, I feel that if I come out it will all be a phase, as I haven't had sex with anyone, although I doubt you must have sex with someone to really know, after all I know I wouldn't do anything sexual with a woman (I would with a guy), but the uncertainty is on my mind. And I won't find a guy in the closet, so I need to come out first.

    I had to get rid of a lot of internal homophobia to get to this point, probably I'm just bargaining or anything like that, should I come out?. I'm 16 and a very indecisive person, so that's why I'm overthinking this. Sorry if people ask this a lot.
     
    #1 gaythrowaway, Apr 14, 2014
    Last edited: Apr 14, 2014
  2. stocking

    stocking Guest

    Joined:
    Jul 12, 2013
    Messages:
    7,542
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    New England
    Gender:
    Female
    Sexual Orientation:
    Lesbian
    You should come out only when you think your ready don't force yourself to do because of other people
     
  3. mikey1345

    mikey1345 Guest

    Joined:
    Jan 19, 2014
    Messages:
    35
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    A few people
    You don't have to come out right away, do it when you are sure of yourself and what you want. And also, don't worry about being 100% gay :slight_smile: chances are it's not just a phase, but if it is then it is. Worry about that when/if that happens!
     
  4. FancyGummy

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Jan 24, 2014
    Messages:
    357
    Likes Received:
    1
    Location:
    MA, UNITED STATES, FURTHER DETAILS UNKNOWN
    You definitely don't have to, but don't be worried about changing your label at some point. If you stick around this site, you'll notice that it happens more often then you might expect.

    Kind of off topic, you don't happen to have Asperger's Disorder, do you? Just curious.
     
  5. lordsnow

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Mar 10, 2014
    Messages:
    63
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Washington State
    Gender:
    Male
    I went though the same thing. I didn't want to come out because I thought if I did it would end up being a "phase". Don't worry about that. Come out when the time feels right, whether that's in a week or a year.
     
  6. Radioactive Bi

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Mar 24, 2014
    Messages:
    1,339
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    UK Midlands
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Bisexual
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    Just take your time to fully explore yourself and your feelings. The whole coming out thing is a long gradual process and you should do it at your pace. If you are struggling with anything or just need to talk about things, the people here will be supportive.

    Also, you are correct. You don't need to have had sex to know your orientation. No one assumes straight people aren't straight until they've had sex so it's no different for any other orientation.

    Anyway, hope everything goes well for you. Remember, just take your time.

    Happy days :slight_smile:
     
  7. gaythrowaway

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Apr 14, 2014
    Messages:
    4
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Not out at all
    I could consider myself a bit quirky, although I don't think I have aspergers.

    Yeah, I also think I could come out without a label, I mean, just saying "I like guys" instead of "I'm gay", to leave the label to the moment I feel comfortable with it.

    After all I feel I need to come out ASAP, I'd love to be able to talk about who I like or not openly and not give any excuses when they ask me what girl I like, or when talking about gay rights it's hard to put myself on an "heterosexual point-of-view" to avoid outing me, and it hurts me a lot when friends/family mock gay people and although I call them out on that (as an "ally", lol, only if they knew) I'm sure that would improve if I told them the truth (100% sure they would accept me, don't know how awkward things will be after.)