Reasons why I think I'm asexual * I'm not entirely sure if I've felt sexual attraction * I rarely feel attracted to people * I have a hard time thinking of sexual fantasies * I don't get butterflies and I don't blush * My attractions haven't changed much since I was a kid * When I feel attracted to people I don't naturally think of sex, I just think of getting closer Reasons why I don't think I'm asexual * I've felt attracted to girls only based on looks and looking at them and imagining getting close to them made me feel warm and happy * I have gotten crushes on girls where I got obsessed and annoyed when I didn't get to see them and super happy if I did * I've been bullied, so maybe I'm repressing my feelings * I hate the idea of being asexual and I think my life would be super boring if I never have sex * I often catch myself checking out other girls boobs and butt and I've done this since I was about eleven * Since I feel hunger and anxiety differently than other people, I might feel sexual attraction differently as well * I sometimes google search girls so I can look at them * I'm socially isolated, so I don't know much people
It sounds like you are describing some level of attraction to women, but maybe you just don't have a super high sex drive. I'm gay, but I don't have the highest sex drive in the world.
You could be a gray-asexual? do not normally experience sexual attraction, but do experience it sometimes experience sexual attraction, but a low sex drive experience sexual attraction and drive, but not strongly enough to want to act on them people who can enjoy and desire sex, but only under very limited and specific circumstances
This might be kind of a weird question, but how do you experience hunger differently? And moreover, how do you know how others experience it? Ditto for anxiety...
I think most people experience hunger in their stomach, while I usually experience it in the back of my throat. I sometimes feel hunger in my stomach, but not most of the time. When people talk about anxiety they usually mention butterflies, I usually get a sharp stomach pain instead. I've only gotten butterflies once or twice in my life.
I think that you could be asexual or gray-a, but the being bullied and the different response to anxiety also suggest that you could have unexplored or repressed feelings. Something like an overall difficulty or resistance to feeling close to others? It may be beneficial to talk to a counselor before figuring that this is your orientation. Low libido can also come from depression or chronic stress, like Cushing's syndrome.
That probably could be just a period in your life that you're not in someone and don't have be a reason that you're asexual. As you said if you have been bullied, that could be also a reason more not to show your emotions. I'm pretty sure that's just a period not asexuality for everything you brought up to us.
I'm in pretty much the same place. I'll tell you that after 10 years of basically assuming I was asexual, I'm looking for something more. For me, asexuality just dosen't answer the questions I have about myself. The fact that you are questioning so intensely means you're probably on to something deeper and should keep digging. You are much younger than me so you still have a lot of time to "experiment". I'm not saying do something sexual, just try and get some time being close to whoever you feel attracted to, maybe the feelings will evolve.
