I'm confused

I'm sure I could of posted within someone else post. There seems to be a lot of confused ppl here. So Here's my story- In HS my best friend and I almost had a sexual encounter. Prior to that- I remember growing up and playing house with girls and one girl having me have imaginary sex with her. I was almost caught that day. I remember being so afraid and never wanting to remember or see her again. One thing worth noting is that I grew up in a religious family my whole life. This girl wasn't religious at all. Mentions of her name terrified me.

Going back to my best friend and I who really had a relationship that was too close to be friends obviously. It was more of just touching but it was super scary the next day for both of us. It came out and my parents found out and separated us. I remember feeling heart broken and missing her. As well as her eventually reaching out to me. Today we are still friends. And never talk about what happened. 10 years pass and I never think of another girl.
I actually fall in love with a guy and crushed on him. I wasn't allowed to date all those years but still talked to guys. I just remember feeling happy that my parents saved me from what would of "distorted" me.

Fast forward again in college I met this teacher who I liked a lot. We hangout against the rules. She started to be touchy and seemed flirtatious. I was flattered because I heard from
people she liked me. I hadnt even thought of girls in so many years. Hadn't thought of her like that. 12 years passed since my BFF thing. But, I was so into my teacher. I started to notice her looking at me from across the room. We eat out and our "friendship" mirrored a relationship so much people began to assume we were hooking up. We never hooked up. I did fall for her. Actually, I love her, and she loves me. I told her, but she says she's not into girls. Haha that's a completely different topic. I attempted to stop our "friendship" coz I liked her. But she wanted it. We talk everyday all day. It become obvious to me I'm in love with her now.

I don't look at other girls like I do her. I've tried to but no one is her. I mean I can say another is hot or pretty but no one does it for me but her. I like guys too. But right now I feel like I could love her and only her forever. I find myself hoping she would see that what we started is not normal. Friends don't act the way we do. I'm also scared to feel this way. According to my upbringing it's wrong. But idk how not to love her.

So what does this make me? Am I a lesbian or bisexual? I can't imagine feeling this way about another girl. I don't feel I could take the risk with anyone else but her. If not her id rather just find a guy to love. I try a lot but I always go back to her.

Idk if I'm in denial. Idk what I am anymore. :bang:

Please help! I've lost so much sleep over this. It's like I'm going against myself. Does that make sense.