How to stop caring about labels?

Would it help if you created your own labels? Something that you feel summarises you. You can even call it "myself", and there you go, you've invented your own label.

Try to think about it as who you are that matters, not what you are. As in...it's the substance that counts, not the name for it. Someone could change the meanings of each label, but who would change their sexuality to the new meaning, just for the sake of keeping their label?

All the best.

 

I have the same problem. I sometimes convince myself that I don't need a label and than I give up and try to find one again.

 

I wish I knew the answer! I have the same problem, and I'm pretty sure I have anxiety + OCD or at least OCD tendencies, so it's even worse. I constantly worry if something "makes" me gay, straight, bi, etc. I think what makes it hard is that sexuality really is such a complex thing -- it's very rarely cut and dry. So it can be really hard to know things for sure, which drives a person like me mad.

Logically, I try and tell myself this: In the end, do all these labels really matter? In the end, isn't the life experience itself -- of loving whoever, being attracted to whoever, sleeping with who you want, enjoying sex, love, passion, arousal, and the full range and intensity of emotions that come with it all, what's most important? Labels are great as a matter of convenience, but when you develop an obsession with them it can really drive you mad.

That's what I try and tell myself -- logically. But sadly, when you have an anxiety disorder it doesn't always listen well to logic.

 

Hey! I definitely know what you and the other two responders are talking about!!

I have been in a questioning phase for a long time now, but I am almost sure of who I am. Still though, there hasn't always been a perfect label for me. I sometimes go "You know what? I don't need a label" and I actually DO believe it in my brain, but then other times, it's just like "UGH I JUST WANT A LABEL ALREADY", you know? I think it's all the pressure of what if other people ask you who you are and everything, but if someone does ask you, just tell them that you are YOU and you don't have to be trapped in one little label. If they say you have to be straight, gay, or something, tell them that actually, you DON'T have to be anyone of those, because it is YOUR sexuality to define, not theirs.

I agree with the others that it's hard because of having OCD tendencies and I'll be honest, I can get myself really frustrated with labels, but I find that not thinking about other people's opinions help. Really, life is so complicated already, don't make the same mistake I did and make it harder by constantly thinking about, well simply put, a word. That's all a label is, a word. The love is really the thing that matters. Instead of thinking about labels, go find love, in whatever gender it may be!!

So yeah, know that love is the most important part of this and honestly, you really don't need to have a label - And even if it might not necessarily define you, if it comforts you, just pick a label you MOST identify with - It'll be okay to change it if you need to as well.

I hope this helps; Remember that you are definitely not alone in this!! If you want to talk, let me know!!

 

I agree with Emulator. Labels are just names after all. And everyone doesn't fit into categories that way.

 

Hey! I know exactly how you feel, I'm in the exact same sticky situation as you..

But I found an article a while ago, written solely about labels and mandatory labeling, and I think you might like to read it - right here!

Not everyone fits into certain binary categories though, so don't stress too much about it! You're your own person who might not fit anywhere, and beautiful in your own way - you are definitely not obligated to label yourself.

Take care, and good luck!

 

I found going through so much change in one lifetime has made me care a lot less about it.
I don't fit in to other people's expectations, and after a long time of railing against it I stopped caring.