Hey guys I'm Daniel, I'm 16 years old, and this is my first time ever seeking advice. I hope I've come to the right place. Let's start off with the very beginning. Since I was a little tiny kid I've always dreamt about my future. About growing up to be a successful man with an amazing wife and the best children ever. I want to meet a girl in my life who I connect with and love with all of my heart and I want a family with her later on. I still want this now. At the start of puberty, I randomly googled "naked boys" on a computer. I started watching gay porn and only gay porn when my body could first get sexually aroused. I almose had an addiction. I did not know what any of this meant until later. I was friends mostly with girls throughout my childhood because I was not as aggressive and athletic as all the boys. I was a kind boy who liked using his imagination. I have dated three girls. And I loved them all, I love girls. But never did I ever think about having a sexual relationship with one. Never do I get aroused by females, only males. I'll be walking in school and see a hot guy and think dayumm. Of course, I know when a girl is beautiful. I am attracted to their appearances and I notice their boobs and butt, but I don't think about sex with them. I've tried to think and see if I could ever date a dude. I talked and flirted with some gay guys I know but none of it felt right. I couldn't ever like a guy like that. I never imagine loving a guy and falling asleep in his arms, I'm just not attracted like that. I want to know what to think of myself and my future. Will I be able to have sex with a girl? Will it be possible? Should I try liking guys? I just don't know. Thank you!
Attraction isn't a push, it's a pull. Don't try and force yourself to want to be with someone. Think less about it and simply go out with guys AND girls and have a good time. The desires will make themselves known to you when the time is right.
You sound like you might be in the same space I was at 16 (tho I didn't have the internet background stuff). I really dug girls, never even thought about gay/straight, prolly didnt really know much - pretty naive about sex, but not stupid - just never thought about it. But at a school dance (with a girl date) I realized I was checkin out another dude's ass, even though I had NO idea why or what I would do. (yep, very naive). But I def relate to slowly realizing I had no interest in sex with girls, but loved em emotionally. I've come to find over the years that somehow (maybe weirdly) I have too much respect for girls/women to have sex with them... not the same I guess for dudes And I had to face all the diappointment/challenge of realzing my life wasn't going to be what what I'd imagined. But Nobody's is!! I think in a lot of ways, coming to terms with being gay is HARDER now than 15 odd years ago, with it all being such a public discussion. But what's a LOT BETTER is that there are a lot of resources now - like this kind of forum - that can give you some ideas. Hang in there, D, you'll sort it out in time. Best Luck!
I agree with Monraffe. I mean I know that probably isn't the answer your were looking for, but everything comes in time. You are so young and have A LOT to learn about yourself. Don't stress yourself out over this. You will find out who you are and when you do you will be 100% happy in your own skin. Maybe nothing felt right with the gay guys at school bc none are them are for you or just not your type. By playing it cool and and dating both males and females you will either A find a really nice boy that you fall head over heels for or you will find a sweet girl you can't keep your hand off of. Just let life happen don't force it.
the only thing I can say is that u cant try liking guys, or try liking girls, you just do. and maybe itll help if u just think about falling in love w/ a person of no particular gender. I mean we fall in love w/ a person not their sex.
