So, I was just having a talk with my mom and I was telling her how I was kind of uncomfortable with her forcing me to church because of my pastor saying negative things on homosexuality and she said "Well, it's the truth" and then I said, "Well, what if one day, scientists prove that being LGBTQ is genetics?" And she said it wasn't and that gay people "practice it". I know it's not true, and I shouldn't be bothered by it because I'm only half gay, but it still hurts - It's like they don't care about human souls and love or anything - As long as the Bible says it, they stand behind it. And you can't even try to explain translations to them - They just think all of that it's man trying to "critique" the Bible. But I mean, come on, GOD is the perfect one, but religion - I believe religion has been one of the main causes of discrimation and I mean, that's not what God planned at all. Anyways, the reason I'm writing this is because it hurts more than I thought it was... Can anyone just cheer me up a bit? And also, do you think that I should just date males like I was planning to do in the past...? This year has been like the only one where I started being open to be the full and complete me, but perhaps just dating males won't hurt, right? I want to date both and be me, but I don't know... My parents just won't accept this for anything... I mean, it just really hurts that I can't even say "That girl is really cute" or be able to tell my parents about my crushes on girls, and I mean it sucks not being able to share something with them that is so important to you, you know?
People usually hate things that they don't understand. It's likely that your mother is brainwashed by religion. She isn't thinking straight (no pun intended) so you cannot take her comments and actions seriously. In no way should you let your parent's views and opinions prevent you from pursuing your own happiness. There will be a time when your parents are dead (I know, not nice to think of) but YOU will have to live with YOUR choices not them. You are 16 years old, you are young and you have your whole life ahead of you. You need to think about you and your happiness because that's the only thing that matters.
Thank you SO much, this really helped a lot. You are definitely right, I do have to live for me. She probably is brainwashed, because she pretty much believes every stereotype about LGBTQ people, like "one person is the man/woman in a same gender relationship" and just all kind of stuff. I should know better not to let things that she says about this bother me, but sometimes, I do need a little reminder of that, so again, thank you so so much!! Please do live your life to the fullest and the way you want to as well! And I see that your current mood is "in pain", I hope you feel better soon!(*hug*)
If she could see the world through your eyes she would not have said something like that . The problem is that straight people can't understand us , they see the world from another perspective , especially if they are religious . So don't care and be happy .
I am so glad my words were able to help you out! :icon_bigg I know you must love your mom very much but you can love someone and disagree with their views. If you were straight you would probably have the same views as she does so it's not really your mom's fault why she thinks that way. Her words are just one of ignorance of the LGBT community, she's not purposefully trying to hurt you. If you stifle yourself to please her though then you'll only be bitter and angry at her so I agree with you that you should live your life for yourself. Thanks so much for the positive words. You have inspired me as well. I feel better already. (*hug*)
You are right! I'm pretty sure that if she would have the same feelings for women I have, she wouldn't be so judgemental, but since she is heterosexual, she really doesn't have any reason to not judge gay people since she is also a Bible believing Christian. Thank you so much and I will try! You be happy too^^ ---------- Post added 3rd May 2014 at 05:45 PM ---------- Yes, I do - She really is the only person who probably really cares about me. And yes, actually, before I realized my sexuality - Although I was for gay marriage, I still held on to the belief it was sin for so long until I realize my own sexuality, and when the way the women I fell in love with made me feel felt so right, I just knew it couldn't be sin. So, you make such a valid point! And don't worry, I'll continue to do as I please now. And it's no problem and aww, I am so glad you are feeling a little better!! <33
Ask your mom if being straight is a practice She would probably be pissed, so I don't actually recommend doing that, it's just something I would do
The bible has many flaws. It says the earth was made in 7 days. That's rubbish. It's just a guideline.
I always found it amusing when people speak of homosexuality as a practice that we force ourselves to carry out. Do people realize how much more difficult it is for LGBTQ to find appropriate partners? Being a 'practicing' homosexual sounds like the life right now. Where do I sign up?
If I were told that I'd say, well, practice makes perfect! There's no way to make a straight person fully understand or get how we lgbt individuals feel and are inside. The most we can do is educate and hope they're willing to basically just go with it. I don't know what cis and straight feels like, but I'm ok with them.
Hmmm..... Damn, why does is shhe like that. Well here are a couple ideas to help 1.) Tell her that god had made each person in his vision and created all his children equally 2.) If she says anything that cancels number one, state that you didn't decide to just like the same sex in a day, it's not a choice or practice and obviously shouldn't be forcing you to do things you don't want to do or go to 3.) Try to ask why she thinks it is a practice and how and or why it is practice, also in what way is it a practice. I hope i helped
You may just have to hang in there until you're 18. I certainly wouldn't change who I dated or wanted to date just because of my parents. However, at under 18, if they *strongly* disapproved, I might keep it on the down-low. :/ (For your sake.) Once you're out of the house, things will get easier. It will be easier to be open with your parents, and to challenge them a bit more openly with your beliefs. In time, they will either have to accept you, or, watch their relationship with you deteriorate. Something which no loving parent wants to see. Meanwhile, you can do what you can to Google facts which explain that same-sex attraction is inborn, and present them to your parents. I saw a really awesome video produced by PFLAG, I believe, a while ago, which basically presents all of that very understandably. It's a bit long, and has more than 1 part (I only watched 1 part of the multi-part thing), but it was really impressive. Anyway, if I can find it again, I'll post it to your wall or here or something for you. Just don't be super let down when people like your mom won't even watch it. The thing is, they're not open to having their pre-formed bias & opinion disconfirmed. So very often, I find that they shrug 'evidence' off and just refuse. But, in time, if they realize how you feel and that you're *not* changing, they may pay more attention to this type of stuff. ---------- Post added 3rd May 2014 at 10:23 PM ---------- Here we go, this is the one I watched: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mj2aDSkiIzg There are apparently other vids in the series, and you can probably find them by browsing YouTube's suggested videos list that always crops up on the sidebar. Hope this helps!
Haha she would be; probably would said I need more of the "word" in me or whatnot xD But still, I asked something similar to my dad - I asked him if he choosed to like women and he said he did:rolle: But thanks for your comment, it made me laugh ---------- Post added 4th May 2014 at 05:42 PM ---------- Well, I do believe that my God made the Earth in 7 days - I mean, I believe that God is amazing - It can be hard to believe from human perspective, but God isn't human. He is flawless, which is why it can be hard to understand some of his amazing creations, like all the stars and galaxies in the sky. And with that, I'm going to stop preaching now haha. But yes, I agree that a lot of the things in the Bible are just there as a guide and to show how it was way back then - Basically, my rule when it comes to the Bible is to exempt anything against equality - Because I believe God is for equal rights. Thanks for your comment, David!!:icon_bigg ---------- Post added 4th May 2014 at 05:45 PM ---------- I know right?? There are so little of other girls who likes girls and I wouldn't choose something that limits the people I can date, more or less choose something that I could be disliked for. My parents just don't see the struggles that it comes with, and just because there has been progress here in America, it still doesn't mean that things are happy go lucky for LGBTQ people. Thanks for your feedback ---------- Post added 4th May 2014 at 05:48 PM ---------- Omg that first comment haha :roflmao: But yeah, I know, I guess they'll never really know until they are in that person's shoes :/ Thanks for your comment^^ ---------- Post added 4th May 2014 at 05:49 PM ---------- That's really helpful, thank you so much for that!! I'll be sure to bring those things up to them one day ---------- Post added 4th May 2014 at 05:53 PM ---------- Thank you SOO much for all the advice!! Yeah, I probably should just wait until I'm 18 and going to college to come out or anything. They probably would try to send me to therapy or something if I tell them as a minor >< And thank you so much for the videos, I really could use those!! Again, thank you so much, this helps a bunch!!(*hug*)
