I realise that title isn't exactly very informative, but I couldn't think of a better one haha. Basically, I only began to come to terms with the fact that I'm not straight a few months ago. It took me ages to even notice for some reason, even though I had crushes on girls since secondary school. I fairly recently came out to my close family and friends as bisexual, but now I'm unsure if that's what I am. I have had crushes on men before, and still do, but very infrequently and I'm unsure whether it's anything more than aesthetic attraction. I used to fantasize about men, but no longer do. I'm starting to question whether I liked men because I felt I had to because that was 'normal'. Since admitting to myself and the people I'm closest to that I like girls, I've become much more interested in women in general. It's kind of like admitting it opened a floodgate or something. Anyway, recently I find myself attracted to girls way more often than to guys, and I only fantasize about being with women. I've also found that if I purposely try to imagine being with a guy romantically, I feel nothing at all any more. Another thing I've noticed recently is that when I am attracted to someone I don't tend to feel sexual feelings towards them, yet I am not opposed to having sex. I find that I'll say 'Oh, she's really cute' and my friends will be like 'Oh, ohhh!' and take it to mean I want to sleep with them, when really I mean 'I'd love to snuggle with them while playing video games together' or 'I'd love to go on an adventure with them'. Is that normal? Other people sometimes make me feel like I'm weird for not immediately feeling sexually attracted to people. This post got kind of long, sorry! I hope my rambling makes at least a little sense. I'm just very confused, and feel kind of like at 21 years old I should have things like this sussed out.
It is possible that you're now able to express yourself, and you're making up for lost time. This may explain the sudden draw to women. Sexuality is pretty fluid. Hell, humanity is fluid. You can be romantically available to one person, but never sleep with them. On the same token, you could have the bedroom hots for one person, but never consider them as marriage material. That's part of the beauty of humanity, is that there are so many variables and factors. You can worry about labels and wanting to identify yourself, but so long as you have a desire to love, do that. Love. If a woman comes along that tickles your fancy, love her. If a man comes along that does the same, love him. Just love. The rest of you -- heart, body, and soul -- will either follow, or they'll let you know better.
Hey! So, I think that there's a chance you might be bisexual with a preference to girls, but there's also a chance that you're an open minded lesbian Alternatively, you could be also anything else and any label (or no label) you eventually come to terms with is perfectly fine since it's the way you feel that matters. From what you said, you might be demisexual, you should check this out and see if it fits you, and whether or not it does - do keep in mind that you deserve to have sex only when you want to, and have every right to not fit into the "norm" that's surrounding you. Also, 21 isn't old, and even if you were older it wouldn't have been abnormal for you to figure yourself out. (*hug*)
Yeah, you have a good point there. I guess that when it comes down to it labels don't really matter, and maybe I shouldn't worry so much. I guess I just like who I like and I'll deal with whatever happens in regards to that haha I did read about being demisexual before and it did kind of make a lot of sense to me. I think that might be the case, if I've understood the definition correctly.
I don`t think that is weird at all. I started to open more to myself about my sexuality, i can`t really picture myself with a boy right now or in the future. It`s all girls, girls and more girls. Out from what i`ve seen and read, it is a normal thing. My friends are a tiny bit homophobic, and they also have tons of questions to me whenever the topic comes up. I don`t really want to tell them when i find someone cute, because they would think "she`d like to sleep with them". I don`t think anything of that isn`t normal. I can relate to what you are saying.
I'm glad you can relate, it's good to know there are other people who feel the same way But yeah, it's definitely girls, girls, and more girls for me too, with the occasional guy that I find aesthetically pleasing but am otherwise not interested in.
