I'm still really unsure if this could even be classified as something that may have indicated my sexuality but heck I'm just bored and I feel like sharing this "discovery." Years ago as a pubescent little middle schooler I remember I went to get "checked up" by my doctor, who was a woman. I remember it was my first time getting a breast cancer check up and I was literally so confused so when the woman was saying how she was going to "show me herself" how to perform a self breast check I was a bit startled. I'm not gonna bore you guys with details basically I had to partially expose myself to her in a hospital gown and she touched/did the breast examination with her fingers on me ( you know the one where you do the two finger rubbing thing.) I remember sort of being aroused by it all but my doctor wasn't that physically attractive but at the same time I wasn't grossed out or upset at another woman seeing my breasts, and not just because she's my doctor. Fast foreword year or two later in eight grade or ninth grade, I went for another examination w/ a different female doctor and she asked if I knew how to do the breast examination on myself I lied and said I needed help, she was a bit better looking than the last doctor but whatever. I always feel like I have these weird "vague" gay memories that I did not think were specifically sexuality indicators when going through them but now I can look back and sorta be like, " Wait a second...?" I still have no clue but I just wanna know if anyone else is like this.
Yes, I completely relate. Often, when discussing sexuality with a friend (who is also questioning/lesbian) I will suddenly remember something that happened when I was younger that could have been an indication of my (possible but unsure) gay-ness! I can't remember them all but here are a couple of examples: One time I was at a friend's birthday sleepover and another girl there was wearing some very short-shorts. She and some others went outside to play on the trampoline and then came back inside, having changed into their pyjamas. I vividly remember looking at her legs and thinking how nice/hot they looked (she was very pretty and tanned) and said something along the lines of: "oh you've changed your shorts! Why aren't you wearing your shorts anymore?" She jokingly replied "why are you looking at my legs?!" And gave me this kind of flirty/jokingly angry look and I just remember I instantly felt like "oh crap I've been found out". It was weird, I've had lots of instances like this where I would be experiencing attraction to girls whilst not consciously acknowledging it/realising it was not something that all "straight" girls did, if that makes sense? (It probably doesn't though!) I also remember being "attracted" to the boyfriends of hot women?!! Although this is somewhat different from my above reply and from what you were saying, it kinda relates to the same theme of being an indication of sexuality that I didn't see at the time. For example I remember watching the "Friends With Benefits" movie starring Justin Timberlake and Mila Kunis and having a "crush" on Justin. I then realised that I only like him because of the fact that he has sex/a relationship with Mila in the film. I can't remember all the specific examples but I've experienced this with other women as well.
I have a couple of gay childhood things that stand out in my mind. Between the ages of about 3 and 7, me and my best friend at the time (who incidentally is also gay nowadays) used to walk everywhere holding hands and we used to kiss each other on the lips and think nothing of it and we used to cuddle when naked or in the bath. I also remember being about 9 or 10 and going away on a school excursion with another school and one of the kids dads was a really great story teller and I always wanted to sit near him. There was a bunch of times when he was telling a story and I (subconsciously) started touching and rubbing his leg. I sometimes wonder that maybe the Dad was gay and I was picking up on it. Those are my stories. Peace!
my buddy and i in the 5th grade would hang out after school and get butt naked. We would run around his big property and hump each others butt cheeks till we passed out
I remember my dad had a book of the works of Frank Frazetta (an excellent artest that paints sci fi pictures of beautiful nude women) and I'd often take it and look at it but feel really inexplicably guiltly about it and hide it under my bed. Another time when I was a kid I snuck into the computer room at night just to look at pictures of Angelina Jolie.
Becoming whatever the kid equivalent of aroused is when my friend played rough with me and was on top of me.
This is gonna sound incredibly weird but when I was little this girl showed me her vagina like not proper porn star ish ;_; I mean like she just lifted her pants up and my mum and dad always used to jokingly call me a lesbian because I never had male posters up it was only ever of females c; Oml P.S I didnt ask to see her vagina js c;
3rd grade, my classmates and I had recently discovered sex. My friend (same sex) and I were super interested in it. Even more than after I hit puberty. We would talk about it a lot, and eventually it led to us dry humping each other during recess. We'd also show each other our underwear.
In first or second grade, a female friend of mine kissed me on the cheek out of the blue, then apologozed.. I was startled, but definitely okay with it. I saw her the next day and wondered if it was okay for me to go give her a kiss, because it had felt nice, but I decided not to because I thought she would be mad at me.
First earliest memory of sorts in that nature. I remember when I was in Kindergarten, the first time I like rough housing with my friends I thought were cute(but didn't really know it at the time) Grabbing their arms from behind and holding them for any reason for any altercation. I remember the first time I did it, he was the cutest boy in the class and was in the kitchen set, I pretended I wanted to play with him and started nudging him, once he started pushing me back I grabbed his arms and held him. He was laughing and I was making a face trying to restrain him like he was out of control, then I looked up beside us was our teacher, she was looking at me as if I was trying to start a fight, I quit immediately out of shame. For some reason that stays with me as the earliest memory of school ever. ---------- Post added 30th May 2014 at 07:07 PM ---------- Kinda wish I had them memories many of you share, more exploration. I never really acted on anything else back in then. Just high school dances, I'd rub my junk against the behinds of the boys while making my way through the sea of sweaty prepubescent humanity. lol. That was about it, I guess.
I firmly believe that there wasn't a single indication of my being gay as a kid. Sure, I was more interested in female characters in movies than males but I imagine most little girls are that way. The only thing that seems off to me, looking back now, is that I didn't have a Ken doll until I was seven. So my barbies dated each other. It wasn't because I wanted them to date, I just needed a substitute Ken. I eventually did get Ken and never thought about my barbies dating ever again. But I'm pretty sure most girls had a Ken doll. ---------- Post added 30th May 2014 at 07:47 PM ---------- Actually I just remembered, whenever I played house with my female friends, we would always be single moms who lived next door to each other. We never had husbands and the idea of having one was never brought up.
