Hello everyone, I'm new to this site cause I'm in a bad place inside. I don't really know how to express all this, so it might be long. Anyways, when I was younger (middle school to late college) I never dated anyone. I've always been kinda socially awkward and very few people ever thought I was worth the time to talk to. So as you can tell from that, I'm very passive and somewhat submissive naturally. Then one day I was playing around on Netflix and found a movie called "Were the World Mine". It was a gay movie and I just fell in love with the movie. I just found the two characters so beautiful together, physically and emotionally. So I really began questioning myself (which I had been throughout the years) and started to visit my campus's LBGT center. I ended up dating two guys (different times of course), however, they both ended cause there was no emotional attachment, and I couldn't entirely find out why. Part of me thinks it was because they were both far more submissive than me, but wouldn't that just be a physically/personality flaw? And recently, I've been thinking about women, and realize that I have no physical sexual attraction to them, but there's an emotional lure towards them. I also don't know what to make of this, I've never slept with a woman, so that could be part of it. At the moment, I feel like I'm sexually attracted to men, but emotionally attracted to women, and I don't know what to do. I'm actually very worried about it...
Heeey, You really shouldn't worry about it. I actually felt (and still kinda feel..) the same way. I was never attracted to guys but, I was getting crushes on guys at school, etc. I always found girls beautiful and sexually attractive. I always checked out girls, not boys. I thought I was bisexual for a long time but, later I understood my attractions. In our society, we are told to fall in love with opposite sex, and it's hard to get rid of that pressure, to be something, they want us to be. Romantic attraction, in my opinion sometimes, is easier to influence. Sexual attraction..not so much because, you just feel attraction or lust and you can't control it. I understand how confusing it is to you. For me, emotional attraction started to grow, when I started to acccept myself for who I was. Then I understood, I can have feelings for same sex too. Sometimes, romantic and sexual orientation is not the same thing , so, you may be heteroromantic homosexual. Anyway, I know it's easy for me to say but, you just have to let it go and go with a flow... to me it looked impossible but, I did it somehow. Just do what you feel is right to you. Hold on. If you need someone, I'm here for you xx
First off, thank you very much for replying. It's nice to not feel like I'm completely alone with confusion. However I do have a question, what do you do when you're heteroromantic homosexual? I'm a very, very monogamous person, so I could never do an open-relationship. I don't want to be alone for the rest of my life. I'm almost 25 and feeling slightly hopeless about it.
You are young in my opinion. I think you should date people and, see how you feel about this. Just follow your heart. There is no formula in love, you have to feel it, don't think too much, no matter how hard it is, you will figure this out
