Okay, so I'm gay. Or at least I label myself as gay. I am romantically and sexually attracted to guys. When I grow up, I want to marry a guy. I'd only really consider having a relationship with a guy, at least for the moment. I am more attracted to guys. BUT I also find women attractive. Sexually attractive, that is. When I masturbate I think probably 50/50 of doing stuff with both girls and guys., if I'm honest. I can't say which one I enjoy more, but I enjoy both. I'm not really into watching porn, but I do look at pictures, both of scantily-clad men and women. I get attracted to both. Again, hard to say which one I like more. Sometimes it depends on the day. Or what mood I'm in. It just depends. Although I am turned on by the idea of having sex with a woman, part of me is unsure if I'd seriously be up for it. See, for it to be complete for me, I think that there would need to be another factor involved in the act: love. I don't want to go sleeping around, doing one-night stands, etc. I'm not that type of guy. When I have sex, I'd want to be in a committed relationship with another human being. And I just can't see myself in a romantic relationship with a woman. Maybe there's a couple girls out there, I don't know...but I don't feel anything for them. I've never related to girls the same way I've related to guys. I don't love them like I think I'd love a guy. I suppose technically I would enjoy having sex with a woman, but I don't want to try to get it. (Keep in mind I have not been in any sort of relationship as of yet. I'm only 16) Now, because it seems doubtful that I will ever be in a relationship with a girl, and that I will seek a relationship exclusively with a guy, I call myself gay. I thought that this would probably be an accurate title. Although an attraction to women exist, my eyes are mainly steered towards guys. But lately I've been feeling like I'm just lying to myself. Technically, I guess I'm bisexual. And when I tell myself or others that I'm gay, I feel like I'm not being completely honest. Although I'm only out to certain people outside my family...I kind of enjoy being the "gay friend". Around the two friends who know, I say a lot of stuff like "fabulous!" and point out hot guys that make them think "how could we have not known about this guy before?!" My female friend that knows has told me personally that I am her GBF, and I have no problem with that. :lol: I can't really explain it, I just like acting gay under certain conditions. But I'm not COMPLETELY gay. And I'm not sure that I want to tell people that although I love men, I masturbate to girls a good amount...obviously I don't want anyone else knowing that I masturbate period. And why should I come out as bisexual when I want to be in a relationship with a dude and only a dude? Plus, part of me kind of wants to be gay, not bi if I'm honest. That sometimes gets me worried that I'm not being honest with myself just because I want to be gay. BBF doesn't have the same ring as GBF. No offense to any bisexuals intended you all are wonderful people! It's just how I, personally, feel.. So here's the point of this: I've pretty much accepted that I'm gay. But how do I accept to myself that I also like girls in a certain way, and that I'm not 100% gay? And what are your thoughts on all of this? Any advice/words of encouragement would be greatly appreciated
I don't think it is unreasonable to label yourself gay and still fanaticize about women. The label itself might mean different things to you than others... For instance, since you only see yourself with men romantically and can't see yourself with a woman, then I think the title of gay would certainly be truthful. I don't think most of us tell others what we like to masturbate to. So I don't think an omission of truth is really a break of trust with friends or family...
Thank you, this was a very interesting read and made me feel a lot better about myself, because I've been suspecting that I'm Kinsey-5 and not 6. Though I wish I was 6 so that things would be a bit easier. I'm listening to the numbers pointing towards gayness. And I thought I wasn't really gay when I realized that it's not a muscled up body that turns me on. In fact thinking about is better than any kind of real representation of nudity. I only want to see it if it were followed by me touching those things that I see. Man I'm so demi.
You could be like bisexual homoromantic or something if you really want to change labels?? Unless it's just the idea of being with a woman, as opposed to actually being willing to have sex with one. I know I've seen like 5 threads here about straight men who like gay porn in the past two days so it could be one of those situations. Some people like things in fiction that they don't in real life. so yeah in conclusion if the above is true then I think that you are totally gay good day sir
I'm having a similar problem, although I currently identify as bi and have had relationships with girls. I find myself physically (but not sexually--it's weird) attracted to women, but more emotionally (though I think this is a false dichotomy and the two may be inseparable). I have always been a 4, maybe a 3 at some point, on the Kinsey scale, and I'm starting to think I'm a 5, too, and I am wondering if labeling myself as gay might be easier for most of my friends (and even family) to understand, despite the fact I have, at some point, gone out with women. Anyway, I think gay is who you are. I'm not the best one to give advice; more offering a "I'm there with you" (heck, I'm 23), but you seem to have it figured out wayyy more than I did when I was 16. So woohoo! High-five!
You all have been incredibly helpful. I think that I am...no, I KNOW I am gay. Thank you all for making me feel more confident about myself. Also, @Pyromaniac: *high-fives* :icon_bigg
No wonder you feel like you are lying to yourself. You are Bi dude, you are attracted to both Genders with a emotional preference to guys.
No wonder you think you're lying to yourself mate. You are Bi. You are sexually attracted to both genders but have an emotional preference to guys.
