For a while now, I've been labelling myself as aromantic. I know labels shouldn't be important. Maybe it's just me with a need to 'know' who I am. I'm almost certain I am aromantic. I only came across the word this year and before then, I never knew such a thing existed but this word seemed to explain to me why I have never wanted a relationship. I thought it was to do with my gender identity, not wanting a relationship because I'm in the wrong body but then after hanging around on EC for a while, I've realised that being trans isn't really an obstacle. Yes it might be for a potential partner but it didn't explain why I feel so repulsed by the idea of being in a relationship. It's not that I think relationships are bad. It's just the way I feel about myself being in a relationship. Despite being aromantic, I am sexually attracted to women and this makes me feel terrible because I realise that had I been born a cis guy, I would probably be one of those type of guys that only do casual hook ups. :icon_redf Maybe it's because of this, I'm not sure, but I am ashamed to say that I'm aromantic because it makes me feel like a predator with no interest in love, only sex, so I've been contemplating doing a u-turn and telling people that I came out to that I'm asexual so nobody will ever need know. But then I'm not being honest with people. I don't know what to do
If you dont want a relationship that is perfectly fine. There is nothing predator about it as long as youre safe and honest with the person. And you may just be at a point in your life that you do not want something romantically. Just be yourself and try not to be ashame of it.
Don't let labels run your life, you may simply at this point not be ready for a relationship & in the future may want one! Nothing wrong with being single of course, you can be an honest person with whoever your partner is ATM & single.
Thanks for the replies guys. I dont know. I just feel like I've wasted so much of my life. I'm 26 and never had a relationship. To be fair, I never wanted one and even if I did it wouldn't have been possible. I knew I was attracted to girls years and years before I knew I was trans but my area/schools/family/work were really homophobic. But now...I don't know. Things haven't changed that much. I still don't think I would want a relationship. All the flowers and hearts stuff makes me a bit nauseous but I'm sad because of the years I have wasted and never having had the experience of being young and in love. But then again, if I'm aromantic then I wouldn't be capable of love but all the same, it's something I'm sad I have never and will never experience.
Maybe you're not the "romantic" type who celebrates Valentine's Day and brings flowers to his girl, but you can have a relationship without doing much of this "cute" things, just saying. Not every relationship is like that.
