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How do you feel when you are attracted to someone?

Discussion in 'Sexual Orientation' started by Elementsroyalty, Jun 6, 2014.

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  1. Elementsroyalty

    Elementsroyalty
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    For a long time I have labeled myself as asexual for I had no interest in anyone. However, recently I have begun longing for a relationship. But, I'm not entirely sure if I'm more attracted to girls or guys.

    If I see a good-looking girl, I don't get very nervous (probably because she is unlikely going to realise I'm interested in her), but I won't be able to stop looking at her and feel a bit fuzzy inside

    When I see a good-looking guy, I will get really nervous and try to not pay any attention to him.

    I can imagine myself being happier and more comfortable with a girl, but then being with a boy doesn't feel wrong either.


    I'm still so confused about my feelings, so I'm wondering how you feel when you are attracted to someone? How do you know you'd like to be in a relationship with them?
    Also, if you aren't bisexual, how do you feel about the gender you aren't attracted to? How do you feel when you are around them?
     
    #1 Elementsroyalty, Jun 6, 2014
  2. thekillingmoon

    thekillingmoon
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    I feel excited and happy if they pay attention to me and talk to me. It makes my day. And I want to be closer to that person. Physical contact with them makes me happy, like when they casually put a hand on my shoulder. I also think they're extremely cute and want to kiss them.

    With the opposite sex there is no excitement. If a guy gets too close physically and invades my personal space, it makes me uncomfortable.
     
    #2 thekillingmoon, Jun 6, 2014
  3. Dryad

    Dryad
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    ^this
    Also I get a bit nervous and I blush if they hug me or get very touchy, it's a feeling I don't get with people who I see strictly as friends or with relatives.
     
    #3 Dryad, Jun 6, 2014
  4. biAnnika

    biAnnika
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    When I'm *emotionally* attracted to someone, I feel an urge to get closer to them, to share things with them, to know them better and help them to know me better. I can feel an achy place inside me from that desire, as well as a bit of thrill of the forbidden and "uh oh, not this shit again" (since I have a stable partner already, and can find love and emotions for others very taxing and inconvenient). And if my attraction seems to be reciprocated by the other person, I tend to start finding myself becoming physically attracted as well.

    When I'm *physically* attracted to someone, *that's* when I get awkward and shy...I get scared that my attraction will be inappropriately apparent and/or be read as an invitation (which due to having a monogamous partner, I really can't be issuing such invitations). But yes, I will take advantages of "safe" opportunities to see the person, and the "fuzziness inside" I can totally relate to. And if it turns out that for whatever reason I'm around the person a lot, I find I tend to develop emotional attachment rather easily (unless they show themselves to be not worthy of it, in which case the physical attraction tends to decrease as well).

    It sounds a bit like your experience is similar to mine, but for different reasons. Where my discomfort with attractions tends to revolve around already having a partner, yours could be around inexperience with attractions and relationships? Just a thought.
     
    #4 biAnnika, Jun 6, 2014
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