Hi lovely people of the internet. I'm new and just discovered this site and am seriously happy that this is a place i can ask about my sexuality. I've recently come out to a few people as lesbian but I'm not really sure that's the right term. I have been with guys only for 7 years now and have never really enjoyed sex. I realized I was into girls when I was younger but now that I've finally said something about it, I've either become painfully shy or just aren't attracted to women at all. I have had romantic relationships but i don't particularly enjoy the sexual part of it. I have thought I might be asexual but that honestly scares the crap out of me and I'm not sure how to deal with it. I often fantasize about about guyxguy and question if I would be more comfortable as a male but I don't really understand it and I really just want to be happy and comfortable in my own skin. Any advice?
I'm inclined to think that maybe your sexual/romantic attraction (or lack thereof) might just be a result of not having met the right person. As for your gender identity - it's apparently not unusual for a straight/bi woman to fantasise about seeing or experiencing male x male intimacy. (for a fantastical portrayal of this, see the Gwen character in the movies Eating Out 1 and 2). Hopefully one of the trans* members of EC might be able to enlighten you a bit more on dysphoria and body image. Sorry that's not much help. Peace! (*hug*)
Maybe you are bisexual? Maybe the person you love will come eventually and you shouldn't rush it. Even if it feels bad. It's not bad to be asexual, either. Maybe you have a low sex drive, so what? But do you feel emotionally connected or romantically attracted to people?
I connect emotionally with people to a certain level, but when it comes to anything sexual I couldn't care less what's going on. it just feels very much like its for the other person and not for me. I am a very extroverted person though and like people and their company but get bored really quickly once it becomes romantic because I can't be bothered about the sexual aspect of a relationship. You're probably right though, I am probably getting ahead of myself and over thinking it, I've still got lots of people to meet so I hope it sorts itself out over time Thank you
