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Sexual or romantic attraction?

Discussion in 'Sexual Orientation' started by confuseduser99, Jun 26, 2014.

?

Is sexual or romantic attraction a better indication of your sexuality?

  1. Sexual

    18 vote(s)
    62.1%
  2. Romantic

    8 vote(s)
    27.6%
  3. Other

    3 vote(s)
    10.3%
  1. confuseduser99

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    Which is more meaningful and telling about one's sexuality. IMO, it would be sexual, since it seems to be innate. You're either sexually attracted to someone, or your not. Romantic attraction however seems to be something you develop. This can be developed with anyone who you truly love/care for. What say you? Vote, and explain!
     
  2. justinf

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    Even though this rule doesn't really apply to me, I do think that generally sexual attraction is more telling. It's like you said: it's innate, no going around it because it comes naturally.
     
  3. Linux Lenny

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    I think both are important . When you love someone you want have sex with him/her but maybe you might feel one is more important than the other for you .
     
  4. Kabuki

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    To determine sexuality, then sexual attraction is certainly the indicator of ones sexuality. Romantic attraction is different and like you said, it doesn't necessarily have to be the same as your sexual attraction. You may be romantically attracted to anyone but only sexually to one gender/sex, and vice versa, be pansexual but only romantically attracted to one gender/sex.
     
  5. RainbowGreen

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    I don't feel really sexually attracted until I developed a real crush on someone, but I say sexual attraction is more valid, too.
     
  6. Fallingdown7

    Fallingdown7 Guest

    Sexual attraction is -the- deciding factor of your sexuality. It doesn't mean sex is more important (certainly I would prefer romance over sex) just that it means it decides your orientation.

    Romantic attraction is usually irrelevant to sexuality. You can be gay and fall in love with the opposite sex as long as sexual attraction is absent. It's also why asexuals are romantic and fall in love but it doesn't make them hetero/homo/bisexual people.
     
  7. TheStormInside

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    I would say the better indication of your *sexuality* is your sexual attraction. If you are talking about overall "orientation," as in, who would you want to be with, I think both are a factor, however. Like Fallingdown said, you can be romantically in love with someone of the opposite sex but still be gay if you aren't sexually attracted to that person. But if you're looking for a relationship I think both romantic and sexual orientation should be considered, and where they overlap is most likely going to end up being the gender you're most compatible with. Then again, romantic orientation is probably irrelevant if all you are looking for is causal sex. So I suppose circumstance can also come into play.
     
  8. YuriBunny

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    I'd say sexual attraction is more important. A girl could be a biromantic lesbian and have romantic feelings for a guy, but she probably wouldn't act on it because she wouldn't want to have sex with him and would have both romantic and sexual feelings for a girl. I feel that sexual feelings drive people more to act on their attractions.
     
  9. Acm

    Acm Guest

    Sexual attraction I think
     
  10. BethLauren

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    For sexuality, definitely sexual attraction. As has already been said, for the overall orientation both factors are important.
     
  11. stocking

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    Both are not just one but I think sexual attraction is the hugest indicator
    for me I do both sexual and romantic .

    many people have even stated that they realized they were gay , or lesbian when they had sex with certain genders and it was a huge wake up call in figuring out their sexuality .
    sexual attraction is definitely tops so I'll have go with sexual attraction
    I think that's why it's called sexual orientation it focuses on who you like to sleep with .
    But both can help but sexual attraction can be very accurate on what a person likes and their sexual orientation . Also some lesbians said in the past they enjoyed having sex with men but when they slept with women it was much better and it felt it felt complete and and for filling as many of them would tell you after that they no longer had desire to sleep with men and only wanted sex with women after first having sex with one .
     
    #11 stocking, Jun 26, 2014
    Last edited: Jun 26, 2014
  12. Nychthemeron

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    Oops, I voted because I assumed you was... well, me, not you as in everyone.

    Sorry.

    To me, sexual attraction is the indicator of your sexuality. I don't know how people can argue otherwise, even if they're asexual, because then they would have no sexual attraction.

    I voted for romantic attraction because... well, honestly, I misunderstood the question and just voted too fast. However, I'm going by homoromantic now, so to random passersby, I will probably seem like a gay guy. But I'm not. I'm just a homoromantic guy, because in my mind, gay only applies to those who are homosexual, not asexual.
     
  13. wanderinggirl

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    I was voting in terms of relationships. I tend to be equally divided in terms of sexual attraction but enjoy my relationships with women more, so I put romantic. But yea I guess sexual attraction is a huge factor for me.
     
  14. BMC77

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    Sexual attraction. I figure sexuality is about sex.
     
  15. C06122014

    C06122014 Guest

    Sexual orientation has I think more to do with romantic feelings you have for a person, the reason for which I think this is because a lot of gay men (might think they)have romantic feelings toward a woman(or actually have feelings)at some time and I know this because I thought I did for a girl for three years, only at that point was I ever confused about my sexual orientation. Only after beginning to feel something romantically for a guy did I begin to come to terms with my sexual orientation because I realized that what I felt for the girl was just a sort of admiration and was never necessarily romantic. But at the same time I think it's nor one nor the other that determines the sexual orientation of a person I think that you have to be attracted to a man or a woman both romantically and sexually which Is why I don't understand, when a man/woman feel something for both genders(have nothing towards it I just don't understand it although I wouldn't mind someone explaining it to me if anyone has time)
    Sorry about the length of this passage
     
    #15 C06122014, Jun 26, 2014
    Last edited by a moderator: Jun 26, 2014
  16. confuseduser99

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    I agree that both are important for a relationship, but as many have said, sexual orientation is dependent on, well, sexual attraction.