Hi! So first off I am typing on mobile so sorry if there are a few errors. This is my first post to this sight. So, as the title suggests, I am very confused and need other peoples advice. I am female, and 14, and it seems that for the past year and a half I have been majorly questioning my sexuality. I know 14 is pretty young, but please just hear me out. I am in tears and cannot sleep. I have had a few 'boyfriends' in the past but I always find myself very unhappy and stressed out. I find guys attractive, but I can never picture myself having sex, getting married, or at all being happy with a guy. For some reason, I want to take all the male roles of relationships, such as purposing, or buying flowers, basically making them feel like the luckiest person in the world, without being a guy. On the other hand though, I can picture myself with a girl. I am very picky, but I can totally imagine kissing a girl. I have never kissed anyone before, but the the thought of kissing a girl makes me feel all giddy and happy inside. I feel like something is off though. Whenever I hear the word 'lesbian' or if my mom asked me if I was lesbian, I completely clenched up inside, feel embarrassed, and deny it on the spot. Am I just in denial? Am I a lesbian? It seems that for weeks at a time, I stay up late and watch those 'are you a lesbian?' Youtube videos but they never seem to answer my questions. I know being lesbian is not a choice, but I really don't want to be straight. Idek, I'm so confused. Someone.. Please just talk to me and answer some of my questions. Sorry if this post was all over the place. Ok. Thanks.
Generally when people feel as they are gay or in your case lesbian they start denying that they are. Perfectly normal. Also I got that from here: http://emptyclosets.com/home/pages/resources/coming-out/parentfamily-stages-of-grief.php
