So I know choosing my label has a lot to do with what I'm more comfortable calling myself, especially being a Kinsey 4-5, and right now I'm calling myself bi with a preference for women. I like how it sounds, and it's technically correct. I experience primary physical attraction to men. I am physically attracted to them, to an extent, but I probably wouldn't date a guy. I feel butterflies when I see the guys who I have "friend-crushes" on and I occasionally feel some romantic attraction to my guy friends. But my attraction to men rapidly disappears if I end up in a situation reminiscent of a date, or if my friend treats me in a way indicating romantic feelings. (perhaps lith-romantic would be the technical term) Whereas my attraction to women is strong, defined, and it doesn't waver. I fall for women physically, emotionally, romantically, and I want to date them. I call myself bi with a preference for women, but is this label giving people (my parents or guys who might have feelings for me) false hope? I want to be completely honest to the people who I come out to, but at the same time I feel like the label I'm currently using is could be misleading. Would it be better if I call myself gay to help prevent people from thinking there is a chance I'll be in a relationship with a guy?
Hey there I personally think you shouldn't worry too much about leading people on or giving people false hope or all that- I think you should use the label you personally think suits you best- what you're comfortable with, basically. I know you've probably heard this so many times, but you know, it's true. You are what you should mainly consider at the end of the day when thinking about label.s Obviously nobody can tell you, "oh, you're gay" or "oh, you're bi", it's really your choice which label you go with. Sexuality isn't a choice, but the label you use that you think represents you best is something that is more flexible at the end of the day. I guess if you think using the label gay is more accurate and shows who you are better, then use it, if you're happy with it. But if you are more comfortable saying you're bisexual (with a preference for women), because that suits you better, then use it. Do you think you could ever date a guy and marry/have a long term relationship with one? If you think it's a possibility, then maybe stick with bisexual, even if the possibility isn't as large as with a women. But if you genuinely think at the end of the day you're only interested in dating women and having a relationship with one, and not men, maybe using gay would be more accurate- but it's only ever your choice Go with whatever you feel you're happy with and good luck (*hug*) You don't even have to go with a label if you don't want to, but I understand that a lot of us do, just so we can understand who we are better.
I feel like that is less your look-out than their own. However if you feel strongly that the label is important to prevent potential misunderstandings... Nobody is going to know who you are until you let them know. Labels aren't great for that since they let people put you into neat boxes in their heads.
In general (and without intending to offend anyone who is comfortable with the lesser-recognized labels), when you're dealing with parents or anyone who is looking for something to cling onto in the hopes that you can still end up in a "normal" hetero relationship... it's usually best to over-simplify and say "lesbian" or "gay" rather than leave any hedge room. For what it's worth, what I've seen a lot of is the whole "heteroromatic" thing is the 2014 version of the "bi" label used during the bargaining phase. Basically a bridge for people not yet ready to accept they're gay. I'm sure there will be people for whom that won't be true, and others who will vehemently argue otherwise... and they may be correct... but I'm just describing what I've observed.
But if your bisexual but into women ,more how is that giving false hope the facts remains that you are attracted to both sexes ,who you choose to date is up to you . just because your bi doesn't mean you have to date both it's your choice . I could understand if you were lesbian and probably worried about this . So what happens when you date a guy ?, will your mom then think lesbians can be turn straight ,if they met the right man because it will surely give that impression . But feel free to choose what you want but I'm still confused how a bisexual person would it's false to label themselves bi just because their into one sex more than the other . Many times I've seen bisexual women who prefer men more have no problem saying their bi but when it's the other way around and it's a bisexual women that prefers women they act like their doing something wrong by saying their bi . Bisexuality means attractions to both sexes , who you choose to date is your choice . are you physically attraction to men sexual at all or you just find them aesthetically pleasing (like you can notice a guy looks handsome )?
