I feel like I'm slowly but surely losing my attraction towards men. I've never been attracted to girlsso 100% gay but I haven't ever had any romantic relationship with a man and nowadays I'm slowly beginning to notice I'm not even looking at guys anymore. I think it's because Im starting to get convinced I'll never be able to come out and therefore being with a guy is not going to happen either so it's a waste of time even bothering to think about it. I don't know what to do about it.. I'm not asexual or aromantic either.. and don't want to turn into one. No offense to anyone intended
I don't know when you came out to yourself, but I think there's a phase after discovering one's sexuality and accepting it as fact that it's almost impossible not to think about all the wonderful options for hooking up. There's that guy over there! and that dude! Where did all these hotties come from! Homophobia be damned I wanna sleep with all of them!! But then the excitement wears off, your sexuality becomes routine. As it should. You're no longer gonna lust after every single person of the gender you are into. And then reality starts coming back as well... the not-so-fun parts of being gay. Dealing with homophobia, contemplating coming out, the sense of loss over not having a "normal" life: these are the things you eventually have to deal with, and they will always suck. To get out of the rut it might take one special guy, or it might just take you reaching a breaking point where you no longer want to hide who you are and coming out. Any of these things might alleviate the depression and restore your sex drive; or maybe it'll be something else. But either way, try to look for some way to change your current situation and feel less isolated. Maybe just talking to one friend IRL will help you get out of this rut.
Im having the same problem as RAdam and this really helped! (I came out to myself 2 years ago and this really sorted out most of my confusion)
I guess that makes a lot of sense , I'm not ready to come out so that might take a while.. But definitely good advise thx! And yeah you're right I'm making too big of a deal of my orientation and feel like it defines a person but that's why I'm probably not ready to come out yet too afraid it'll be all I am, a gay guy.
