I've had crushes on girls since I was 6 and wanted to be sexual with girls from about 13. And enjoy les porn over any other (don't watch any more). But I've always had boyfriends. I've never felt that connection with any if them tho and I'm always wishing I could be with a girl. I'm just scared everyone will think I'm just being silly as I've never told anyone that matter to me. I've had two sexual encounters with a girl (my ex boyfriend knew and we experimented once with a three some and I loved it more than sex with any man and once in a club with a promoter just foreplay but was great). I'm with a guy now but all I can think about is being with a girl. And when I look around there's not many men I think woow but girls it's constant starring and fantasising? Men I just seem to like the chase then we sleep together and I get bored. And I throw my self into long term relationships with men possibly to avoid finding out the answers! My questions are Am I just avoiding the truth? Am I bi or actually lesbian? Am I over thinking it? Am I just Young (26) and just not ready to settle down so I'm very curious? If I did come out what if no one believes me? PLEASE HELP IVE FELT LIKE THIS FOR SOOO LONG AND NEVER FOUND ANSWERS!
I wouldn't worry about coming out yet. I personally can't tell your sexuality...i would ask yourself "what emotions do i feel during sex and after? What emotions do i feel when i kiss a man? How do my crush differ from gender or are they the same? And if they do differ..how do they differ?" You could be avoiding your sexuality. My first advice is answer those questions i posed and then following your heart. If you want to be with a certain girl try dating her. Time will tell.
Deep down everything points to girls! I preferred to kiss girls and I always have crushes on girls more than men and if I do have a crush on a guy as soon as we do anything the attraction ends with them but I never have trusted men or let them get close as my dad let me down when I was young , men I just see as meat I think who can't be trusted , I had a lesbian friend who was going to take me to a gay bar but I never got the courage and now I'm with a guy who is very emotionally unstable and it's hard to just end it now but when I do I have no idea where to start.deep down I think I'm bi much more to the women side though. Guess I'm just scared that im possibly going to finally feel like I know who I am. Thank you just nice to hear some one not say "don't be silly" or "shut up u just being dumb" (what ex said when I said I think I'm lesbian when we broke up!
My advice...i had a tyrant for a father..so for a while i thought i didn't like men sexually cuz i didn't trust them what helped me was to go to a counselor...it entailed paying attention to my feelings and soul searching. I didn't have trust issues with men. I could love a man for who he is, care for him deeply, and want him in my life. But, that is what friends feel for one another. So i knew i didn't have trust issues. You could talk to counselors on trevor project..they will listen and are helpful and you don't have to be just suicidal to reach out to them. You could go to lgbt centers and they have counselors for free but appreciates donation. You also could look for a private therapist through your insurance (if you have a policy) or look for one on a sliding scale who specialize in relationships and lgbt issues. It is alright to have a small amount of trust issues...that is healthy because it causes healthy boundaries. But, too much cause no boundaries or unhealthy boundaries. Do some soul searching..work through your past like i had to..express your desires...and let time reveal everything.
You are Bi unless you have no interest in men, but you indicate you still do. The advantage of being Bi is options, options, options you like people based on personality not gender.
Also i wanted to add... I could care for a guy deeply, love him for himself, and want the best for him. I truly cared for the man, but i just didn't want them to touch me sexually or kiss me. It was like a repulsion.. I felt forced even though i wasn't. I just had no desire.. I would just want it to be over.. All i wanted was to talk to them and have fun doing things, but i just didn't want something sexual. I just wanted them to be my friend..no matter how handsome and perfect they were for me. So that help in my evidence of being homosexual. You are always welcome to talk to me more on my profile if you just want someone to share all your thoughts with and get some info about my journey in discovering myself. We can even talk more on this post if you like. I don't mind if you have more questions.
I have no idea what's going on in my head. But from the age of six I guess Ive known I like girls and have jumped at the chance to be close to one. just never had the guts to openly be bi! How do you cope if someone doesn't believe you? It won't let me send pm for some reason. Says I have to speak to admin!
Try going to a online dating site post a profile as a bi/gay woman and see if any women local to you are interested.
Yea i am even unable to send pm have to be a full member.. So people post on the wall of the profile. If some don't believe you...you just walk away. Not your job to convince them. Some parents and friends might be like are you sure? How do you know for sure? You could explain to them your process of discovering your sexuality. But, it is not there job only your job to tell what sexuality you are. So even if after you explain your process of discovering self and then they say ~i don't believe you/no you are not~... Don't let it phase you..just walk away. Most people have dealt with denial when coming to accepting their sexuality..so it is okay for your friends or family to be in denial, but don't let it phase you..let them accept it on their own terms. You just keep doing your thing.
I think once I've ended this relation I will push myself to find that courage to actually put my self out there! Just don't wanna be meeting random who will pray on my nervous shy personality ( I'm like this until I feel comfortable)
I'm getting excited and scared! I can finally be me! Thank you guys this one convo has helped so much!!
