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Any advice would be great guys!

Discussion in 'Sexual Orientation' started by sambo123, Oct 1, 2014.

  1. sambo123

    Regular Member

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    Sexual Orientation:
    Questioning
    Hey guys been having some problems with my sexual health/gender for a while now and I was wondering if there was any help you guys could give me?
    My situation breaks down like this:
    I have terrible performance anxiety, where I cannot get it up with a girl even to the point where I am unable to receive a hand job or even unable to dry hump.
    My sexual fantasies over the past have been mainly centred around transvestites and trans-women. This has been the case since I was eleven. Though I have been able to masturbate over some select cis-gendered women all my life and have found myself reliving past experiences with women where things "worked"
    However there are certain fantasies that I have associated with being the transvestite with a man or another transvestite. These fantasies have become more dominant of late. In turn with that I have watched a LOT of porn in my time and continue to do so as it is now needed to help me reach orgasm.
    Outside of my fantasy life though I have not experienced any attraction to transvestites outside of movies or porn, the ones I have met in real life have been a "let down" of what I see in the porn world.
    Instead I am very attracted to women, and have been described in the past as "shocking" when it comes to perving at women. And all my life I have had crushes on girls. This also translates to a gigantic distraction in my everyday life where wanting to "hook up" with girls has translated into my time that I should be spending working or studying or into hobbies that I want to pursue. I can no longer go out to clubs with at some point asking a girl out. It has earned me the nickname in recent years as "creepy."
    Deep down I would love to be with a woman, but cannot perform sexually with her which leaves me avoiding sex or a woman contacting my penis. Which stops me from satisfying these urges I have, which then leads me to jack off to porn.
    The one time I had no problems getting it up in recent years was when I was with a transvestite prostitute (simply to "try it out") and everything worked fine, however the only thing running through my head was images of pornography.
    I am getting more and more dismayed at my condition. I identify as a straight male, and do not have any attraction to men whatsoever (well at least when they present masculinely). I have heard of such terms as trans-oriented but that does not seem to fit with me. And I feel I am content with my gender (though the thought I could be a lesbian kind of excites me).
    I am at a loss as to what to do, I cannot escape these urges and I am getting worse and worse at satisfying them.
    Is there any way you could help beyond the key point: "stop watching porn" because I've also looked into that and it doesn't seem to help...
    Apart from all of this cluster of problems I live a pretty happy life, I'm outgoing I enjoy myself immensly, and I am eager to get on with my life. I just would like to have sex!