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i'm a lesbian-ish, what now?

Discussion in 'Sexual Orientation' started by Infinitewonder, Oct 21, 2014.

  1. Infinitewonder

    Regular Member

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    Questioning
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    Not out at all
    Okay so i think i'm a lesbian. Since i was little i've always had this feeling of being different in some way, and i never had crushes on boys, like all my friends did. So i just faked along. I hoped and partially believed that someday i would fall for a man,but it never happened, and i only had feelings for girls, but i never did anything about them, and now i've had no experience in relations whatsoever.

    In some way i would even be okay with coming out to my friends, maybe, but i feel like i can't be 100% sure since i have never really had a relationship of any kind with a woman. or man, for that matter :grin: i also feel really lost on how to meet other lesbians (i come from a small place and do not drink..) and i don't know what i'm doing thanks if you read this & any comments welcome!:slight_smile:
     
  2. NatWheeled

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    Welcome!

    I too have never been with either gender physically. You don't need to try out a man to confirm your orientation. Your heart n body knows what it wants, you just gotta listen
     
  3. jay777

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    Gender:
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  4. Eli98

    Regular Member

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    How long have you realsised that you may be a lesbian? Take your time to try to figure yourelf out.
    I understand you about meeting other lesbians (or in my case bi people too). I'm in an all girls school there should be some right but nooo.
    When you find someone you will be able to tell that you like them, like NatWheeled said.
    Good luck and welcome(*hug*)
     
  5. Infinitewonder

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    thanks everyone for being supporting & welcoming! ^^
    i've always thought it would be possible that i'm a lesbian, but now (i'm 21) it is starting to feel i could never be with a man & that i really want to be with another woman
     
  6. Lady Boss

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    Nice profile pic lmfao
     
  7. sls

    sls
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    For starters hello I am in a similar situation regarding any form of relationship with a woman but would like one but don't know where to start so if you figure it out i would love to know
     
  8. smiles30

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    I too am in a similar situation when it comes to girls/women. I have dated men, but have always been attracted to women. I want to meet women and see where that goes, but also do not drink :slight_smile: and am not really into the dancing/club scene. Do you do any activities with women? I play ice hockey and have met some great women that way, they just aren't my age... But I agree with others, you don't have to be with a man to prove you aren't straight. Nor a woman to prove you are gay. Go with your feelings! Only you will know what makes you happy!
     
  9. Ammi

    Ammi Guest

    I think you don't need a relationship to tell if you are lesbian.
    You need to be attracted to other women and , someday, fall in love with someone who is female. Then, if you never felt attracted to males... you are a lesbian ^.^
    But this is only my opinion.
    Anyways, good luck :slight_smile:
     
  10. Alais

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    Hey infinitewonder, I am teetotal and from a small place too, plus I plan to move out to somewhere quite remote in another country!

    I worry too that I have never been with a woman, and have not that much sexual experience (with men) either, except one-ish proper partner.

    I have just started coming out, and I don't know if it is a relief to hear or not, but I still think about all these things now. I feel like I cannot be certain; I mean generally in life how can we be certain about anything? Coming out to me was kind of a quest to feel more certain, and an experiment to see how I would feel. Guess what I was suddenly smiling when I told the first person- no idea why, but I was there grinning from ear to ear.

    I still question things, worry about meeting people, the first experience with a woman etc. But I have found speaking to people online, like these lovely people around us at EC, is helpful.

    I don't have a clue what I am doing! I went to an LGBT event for the first time last week, only because I am studying currently and living for term in a (tiny) city. But that was weird. I think it will be weird even if you had a blossoming scene around you, because it is more like a re-imagining of yourself in these new environments, then the environments themselves. I don't know how to physically get around the lack of LGBT things in your area, I have the same problem, but the internet and YT is a godsend both for virtual and physical encounters (although naturally all those general meeting-up-with-people-from-the-internet cautions apply).

    I sympathise entirely. I am not sure if this is helpful, but at least you are not the only one working things out and we can try to do so together.
     
  11. Fantie

    Fantie Guest

    Typically me a year ago. And now I live for boys lol no shade.