Recently, I've had people telling me that if a lesbian or a gay man wants to 'try' to have sex with the opposite gender, because they are curious, it means he/she is not longer gay. I mean, so many straight girls wants to have a lesbian experience, when they try it, even if they like it on some level they are still straight by society's norms, because they want guys and fall in love with guys. I am not talking about real bisexual girls, I talk about fooling around a little bit drunk, out of curiosity. So why some people 'get away' with it? and why mostly gay people are judged for it?
Straight men are also judged for it as well and told they are no longer straight. I think it has to do with the fact that men are still considered a 'superior' sex and that sex with a man is more lifechanging and important. If a woman has sex with a woman, it means nothing, It's seen as casual, It's seen as 'straight'....where if she were to have sex with a man It's lifechanging, and he 'stole' something from her (which is also why some lesbians think women who have had PiV sex are dirty and undesirable, which is stupid). I have no idea why sex with a man is omg so important and makes you defiled, while sex with a woman means nothing.
I'm gay and have never done anything with a girl. Sometimes though I admit I'm curious and would be willing to try it if she was completely aware I was gay and okay with that and knew that it might not work... lol. But yes, I have wondered about this also. If a long-time guy who was gay were to realize that he was really into girls, I can't help but feel like he would get shunned for going "back to girls".
I've been trying to figure this out as well and it is a double standard sadly. If a lesbian decides to randomly have sex with a man then she isn't a real lesbian. And guess who's she is shunned by...the "real" lesbians and straight people as well who may feel like being gay is a choice. I mean, I feel like sex is sex, and sexual behavior does not equate sexual orientation. If anything, I feel like whatever you do behind closed doors is none of my business and perhaps, with me being bisexual, it makes me non judgmental.
Women, unfortunately, are perceived to be inferior to men, when it comes to matters of sexuality. Having sex with a woman, is just that - sex. Having sex with a man, isn't just that, it is sex - with a man. Heterosexuality is considered the default; the assumption that everybody is this, is very dominant in society. Basically, everybody is straight until proven gay. This is, a great deal of the reason, why, if anyone who identifies as non-heterosexual, goes out and does anything, with somebody of the opposite gender, they are so quickly reeled back into heterosexuality's corner. It is a desperate attempt, at justifying male-female as the best right only way, for any sexual expression. Be it due to religious reasons, or that logic of 'penis fits into vagina, therefore it is right', depends on who is clinging to this default assumption. I second pinklov3ly's remark about, sex is sex, and sexual behavior doesn't always reflect orientation. Just like someone who eats vegetables doesn't have to like them, they're just eating them. Of course, human sexuality is more complicated than that, but the point still stands for consideration. P.S. Pinklov3ly, I fucking adore you, by the way!
i cant see why a true homosexual would want to have sex with the opposite gender, doesnt make any sense to me im personally repulsed to the opposite sex and i expect(ed?) everyone else was like this too
It depends on person, thanks for telling how you feel about it. Maybe you had in mind you are repulsed by the thought of sex with man, not by man as a whole?
what do you mean, man as a whole? i dont mean just sex, i mean romanticly and so on i think true homosexuals wouldnt wanna experiment with them at all
This. I know it's not always black and white but like you said, if someone was truly lesbian/gay, they would only seek relationships with the same gender... right? Sex is sex, and we're all aware of that. I don't know if there's another answer for this.
I hate the phrase "true homosexual", it sounds elitist and makes sexuality into some huge deal that it really shouldn't be. For me, it all comes down to sexuality being fluid. If someone wants to try, I'm not going to judge them. Maybe it'll work for them, maybe not; it's not my place to tell anyone what their sexual orientation is. Some people need the experience with the opposite sex to confirm for themselves that they really are gay, and I think that's fine.
I've often wondered what it's like. But if I did the deed and my family found out I'm sure they would think that would turn me lol
Well theres alot of people who lie and mislabel themselves so i have a need to seperate myself from them, hence "true homosexual" So typically bisexual of you to say its fluid. nice subtle homophobia:dry: I think its weird af and i tend to stay far far far away from those people
I'm not saying that's true for everyone, but I'm not judging anyone for what they need. I have a friend who's a Kinsey scale 6 and she still wasn't comfortable saying she was truly gay until she slept with a man. Then again, that's just my personal experience. I'm a five. I identify as bisexual, but may someday come out as gay because men don't do anything. I don't see a problem with it.
I think it's hard to really understand your own sexuality because we are so heavily influenced by societal norms. I am mostly into girls but I still wonder what it would be like to have sex with a man even though they don't do anything for me. I don't like the term "true homosexual" nor do I like the thought that everyone's sexuality is fluid. Sexuality is extremely subjective so it's important that you do what feels right for you. Try not to be so concerned about what other people think of your feelings. If you feel alone, try and find people that relate to you but don't compare apples with oranges
